*2 hours later*

Nintendofreak: Got any 3s?

Retro: Damnit NF, for the last time, WE'RE PLAYING BLACKJACK!

Nintendofreak: BINGO!

KoD: Well not that this isn't fun but I think we should be escaping now >.>

Nintendofreak: Why do you always do that?

KoD: O.o Do what?

Nintendofreak: Talk with text pictures

KoD: I........Didn't notice >.>

Retro: I agree with the marshmallow, we need to get off of this ship before Clyde does who know's what to us

*On the bridge of the DarkHawk II*

Drake: We'll be arriving soon, sir!

Clyde: I'm glad you talked me into capturing them, torture seems like a much better fate for those two

Drake: Aye sir, I knew you'd like it

Clyde: Everything is going according to plan, the MG-L is ready, and the ADAM elimination syrum is nearly com-*a loud rumble echoes through the ship and power shuts down*

Drake: Oh, what now?!

Amy: Generator 3 is down! Switching to emergency power!

Jarod: Corridor 7 has been breached! Mobilize the troops!

Drake: It's the captives! They're escaping! Jarod, Raphiel! Come with me! Shanks, guard the door! Amy, get us to the flagship!

*Meanwhile in the corridore of the ship, there is alot of fighting while Matrix music plays*

Nintendofreak: Is it me, or is this too easy? *grabs a robot minion and frys it's head with those fire plasmids he had in Rapture that everyone forgot about*

KoD: The easier *jumps on a robot's head and twists it in a 360* the better! *zaps three robots with electricity*

*An entire battalion of minion-bots and kill-bots have entered the corridore. Retro clasps his hands together and slowly pulls a pixel staff from his palms, Retro proceeds to thrust his staff into several robots in a line, then he flings them into the air, and makes swiss cheese out of them with pixel blasts. Retro then does a sideways double-flip kick in a 360, he kicks some robots down and on his way back he decapitates several others. Meanwhile, Nintendofreak is busy frying a small robot when a much larger one pins him down.*

Nintendofreak: You just made a BIG mistake!

*Nintendofreak flips the robot on his back, then punches into the robot's face and yanks out it's CPU core. Nintendofreak then does a backflip while throwing the corpse into the air, when the corpse decents to the floor, Nintendofreak exists his flip and kicks the body into several more robots while shooting small fire bullets from his fingers like a machine gun (he makes his own sound affects). KoD agily hops from robot head to robot head, ripping important wires and such along the way, he then proceeds to bound behind a robot, zap his cranium and uses the robot's own machinegun arm against itself and it's comrads. KoD then tears a leg from a robot and starts smacking several more robots with it, he then plants the leg in the ground to gain momentum, lands in the middle of a group of robots and sends an electrical shockwave through the ground which causes the robots to malfunction and destroy themselves*

KoD: I think that was the last of the-*gets kicked through the ceiling*

Jarod: Oh I'm sorry, mate. Was that yer' pillow?

Retro: No but you can have the reseat!

*Retro charges at Jarod but i stopped by a sword to the face, then a punch in the chin which sends him also to the deck*

Raphiel: 2 down, 1 to go

*Drake, Jarod and Raphiel look at a shaking Nintendofreak*

Nintendofreak: Meep!O.O

*Nintendofreak leaps through the ceiling to the deck while the pirates fallow*

So, the three pirates and the protagonists are both on deck and are just standing across from each other... waiting.

Retro: Well, its 3 on 3, at least it's fair.

KoD: Right, right, but which one kicked me and called me a pillow?

Mariorocks: That one, right there *points to Jarod*

KoD: Thank you.

Charges his fist with Crash and charges at Jarod with his fist cocked back. Jarod makes no attempt to dodge since he's not threatened by the incoming puffball and instead starts to chuckle at his attempt. Just when KoD gets within a foot of him, he coils back and releases into a Li'l Mac's Star Uppercut-esque move and smashes his fist into Jarod's left cheek. Due to the Crash in his fist, it explodes on contact and sends Jarod flying into a railing on the deck. KoD softly lands and walks back over to Retro and MR while the other two pirates look slightly shocked that this little... thing just sent one of their strongest member into a railing.

KoD: Heh heh, take that, pirate.

Mariorocks: ...Okay, what about the other two?

KoD: Oh, I was just concerned about that one, you guys can go crazy on the other two.

Retro: Well, whatever. Mariorocks, you take that sword guy and I'll take the captain.

Mariorocks: How do you know he's the captain?

Retro: Look at his hat! Anyway, let's do this.

So, Retro and Drake start gunslinging and Raphiel and Mariorocks sword-dual while KoD, having already taken out his opponent, looks over the railing opposite the one he knocked Jarod into to view the ocean.

KoD: Yep... that's water. Urk!

(This is pretty much Timnis's idea in this descriptive blurb) KoD is all of sudden grabbed by both stubs and stretched extensively by... Jarod!

Jarod: Lucky shot, ya li'l wankah! I'm gunna rip you in half and make s'mores outta you. Wah huhuhuhu.

All KoD could do was let out a whimper as his body was stretched to its limit and he shut his eyes preparing for his gruesome demise. (end Timnis credit) However, the gruesome demise didn't come.

Jarod: Eh? Wot's all this, then? *keeps stretching KoD, making a boing noise each time*

KoD: Hehe, I forgot my body's stretching capacity is pretty much limitless. Boing, boing, boing...

Jarod: Well, that's alroight, I can still SQUEEZE the life outta ya!

KoD: That you could ._. Eee >.<All>.> ...Hey, uh... if we touch, we won't cease to exist like in Time Cop, will we?

Future KoD:...Dunno *prods KoD* ...nope, we're good.

Jarod stirs and stands back up to look at the two KoDs

Jarod: Oy... I'm seein' double.

Future KoD: He's still dazed, get him!

Both KoDs charge at Jarod symmetrically while Mariorocks and Retro fight their battles as well.

*meanwhile*

Fontane: So thats why I am only posting in this story arc.

Splicer: Gasp, I never would have guessed.

Fontane: New York is boring, back in the twenties it was hip.

Splicer: Maybe if you hadn't killed everyone...

Fontane: I got it, shopping spree.

*Fontane walks down the street and breaks into a clothing store. He steals some odd clothing and puts it on*

Fontane: How do I look ehh? eh?

Splicer: Like a pimp.

*Fontane looks in the mirror to see himself wearing a purple pimp hat, pink pimp suit, and purple pants.*

Fontane: snappin.

*ANNIALATRIX!*

Killface: So you want to what?

Doc Hatchet: Use this thing to launch the Earth into the sun, thereby destroying this guy and his zombies.

Killface: Sounds like a plan.

Barnaby: What does this button do.

*barnaby jones pushes a button which, launches the Annialatrix and a massive chunk of land containing New York, and the surrounding harbor into SPACE*

Fontane: So thats why i can juggle with three ponies.

Splicer: Woooooah-

Rurumbmmar8aruurmrmarnruarmamurjrmamrbaruamrmarujarmamrmcrunkcrunkcraickcrickkrackkirkckrkiakciikkrkk

Fontane: What in the- hey when did we get into space?

Splicer: Two minutes ago.

*Back on the DarkHawk II which has now entered space*

*A cracking sound is heard a a bullet tears apart lumber and nails of a crate that Retro is hiding behind. Retro peaks his head around the corner of the box but a bullet whizzes by his head before he can get a good look at his enemy*

Retro: Jesus!

Jesus: Yeah?

Retro: Oh sorry, not you

Jesus: Well this is fan f***ing tastic! Do you have any f***ing idea how much the bus fare is?! I just went 47 f***ing miles to rush to your aid and now you say you don't need me?! Thanks man, thanks alot

Retro: Well I-

Jesus: No! You don't need me, I just, you know, had to get away from my busy schedule, being the son of god and everything, your savior, but no, just ignore me

Retro: Well I'de like some help with this I guess.....

Jesus: Oh NOW you need my help?! You're lucky I'm Jesus or I'de stick my foot up your ass!

Retro gets shot at some more: Jesus! Can you help me or not?!

Jesus: Sure, whad'ya need?

Retro: Can you do something to make him stop shooting at me?!

Jesus: I guess......

*Jesus closes his eyes and magically jams Drake's pistol (Who happened to have a clear shot of Retro's head at the time.*

Jesus: Done

Retro: Thanks Jesus

Jesus: It's coo'

*Retro forms two pistols in his hand, flips them around then does a side-jump while firing at Drake who finds that his gun is jammed and is forced to duck as Retro rolls on the ground and leaps behind a mast-beam to reload his special pixel bullets*

Drake: Me gun jammed........ME GUN NEVER JAMS!!!

*Drake crosses his arms into his coat and pulls out two twin pistols with fairly long shafts. Retro stealthilly stares at Drake who is in turn staring at him. The both are waiting for the other to make a move. There is a tense silence......Until both gunslingers simultaniously leap from their cover and fire at eachother. Retro gets hit several times but due to his pixel armor, he won't be severely injured. A stray bullet hits Retro in the shoulder which sends him into a short spin, when he faces Drake he fires, directly hitting Drake's pistol which flies out of his grasp. In a rage Drake fires on Retro who leaps behind a barrel*

Retro catching his breath: This isn't working out as well as I hoped....

*Over to Nintendofreak and Raphiel who have locked swords with eachother*

Raphiel: I can feel your soul flowing through your swordplay, you seem to be very confused and angry at the world

Nintendofreak: Thanks for the lesson doc, but don't expect me to pay you!

*The two leap away from eachother. Raphiel slowly scraps his sword across the ground to his side and lifts his hand, profoking Nintendofreak to strike. Nintendofreak gives in and rushes at Raphiel with a blind rage. Raphiel simply lifts his sword to block Nintendofreak's seemingly incredibly powerful blow.*

Nintendofreak: Damnit! Why can't I hit you!

Raphiel: You will never touch me if you continue to let your rage control you, I feel incredible balance covered by a betrayed soul, you are not a worthy enough opponent for me.......Yet

Nintendofreak: I may not be good at swordplay but I rock at friendly FIRE!

*Nintendofreak fires a very large blast of incredibly hot flames at Raphiel which sends him crashing through a cabin room and sets part of the ship on fire. Nintendofreak blows the smoke away from his fingertip*

KoD watches MR's and Retro's battles as Raphiel is fire'd and Retro is behind that barrel.

KoD: Wow... these battles are epic... I wish I was involved in an epic battle.

future KoD: Damn it, GET over here! *is holding back Jarod's sword with his scythe handle*

KoD: Oh, shit, that's right; I am in an epic battle. *rushes over and assists his future self with his scythe handle as well and they shove off Jarod*

Jarod: So there really IS two of you. Ah well, two marshmallows squish as easy as one, eh?

KoD: I take exception to that!

future KoD: Hearing it the second time makes less of an impact... anyway, c'mon! *charges at Jarod with poised scythe and KoD follows along side of him doing the same*

They both do a front flip strike and are both met with Jarod's blade. They pull away and attack in a mirrored pattern, hacking and slashing with their scythes as each blow is matched by Jarod's sword. Then, they both pop up their scythes into Jarod's blade and he's thrown off balance. They took this opportunity to both drop kick him in the stomach using their scythes as pole vaults and send him backward onto the ground. He lands and looks up just in time to see both KoDs with crash-charged fists heading toward him. They both bury their fists into his chest armor and jump back as it explodes off of him. As they land, Jarod stands back up with his chest exposed.

Jarod: You li-ahl bastahds! This is custom-made armor! No more fooling around, I'm gonna fill ya with lead at about 1000 rounds a minute! *pulls out gatling gun*

future KoD: Yeah, run. *scurries away*

KoD: Very well! *scurries away as well as Jarod starts unloading bullets*

The KoDs run while dodging the bullets until they both duck behind a barrel.

KoD:...Oh, hello, are you getting shot at, too?

Retro: Yeah, the guy got pissed when I shot his gun out of his hand... heh heh. ...Hey, hold on, why are there two of you?

future KoD: I'm from the future. I saved me from getting ripped in half by that big guy. Now he's shooting at us, so we're behind this barrel. We'll be fine, though.

Retro: ...Wait, you mean the guy with the gatling gun? He's gonna demolish this barrel!

future KoD: ...Oh yeah. Hm, hold on. *evaporates into a lightning bolt, which ascends up without Jarod noticing*

KoD: Hee, I love doing that. Still, I wonder what he's gonna do.

Future KoD reappears via lightning bolt behind Jarod as he's focusing on shooting the crap out of the barrel, which is somehow holding out this long. Future KoD jumps up and onto Jarod's back and proceeds to shock him... with lightning. As Jarod drops to his knees and then onto the ground, sizzling like last time, future KoD scurries back over to the barrel.

future KoD: That'll hold him for a bit.

KoD: Wait, is that what you did before to free me?

future KoD: Nah, I just crash blasted him. Still, unfortunately that lightning shock didn't kill him, but at least we won't have to deal with him for a while.

KoD: That reminds me... you seem to know some stuff and then not know other stuff like if we'd cease to exist because of that Time Cop thing. If you're from the future, shouldn't you know everything that's gonna happen?

future KoD: Geez, it's not like I have perfect memory. I went back in time long after this happened, I can't remember EVERYTHING I did.

Retro: Hey guys, could you stop doing that exposition and concentrate on the big-hatted pirate shooting at us?

KoD: Oh, we'll be fine... right?

future KoD: ...Um... maybe? Well, whatever, let's just help him shoot at him.

KoD: Right *un-holsters his blaster from the fake sole in his shoe as future KoD does that same*

Retro: You have scythes, lightning, the power of time travel, some... crash thing or whatever you're talking about and now guns? Doesn't that seem a bit excessive?

KoD & future KoD: No. *they both help Retro in firing at Drake*

Retro: C'mon Kirbs, let's wrap up this battle.

KoD: Yeah alright.

Drake: You really wanna finish this do you? Well, al-right. Come get me kids.

Retro: In the absent words of Director, or should I say, *Ahem* "Fontane", let's finish this...Carnival Style.

~KoD swings his scythe and cuts a portal in space/time and then teleports with Retro. Both of them appear behind Drake, who turns around to face them. KoD releases Retro and he punches Drake square in the middle of his face, but doesn't take his fist away and sends Drake flying back.~

Drake: Graaaaaagh! Ow! *Gets to his feet while rubbing his face* You're...strong, kid. But that's alright, try this, I'll break your face right back!

~Drake runs up and pistol-whips Retro slowly and weakly. Retro immediately returns with a super-nova-awesome pixel blast and obliterates Drake with no effort whatsoever.~

Retro: Okay, now what?

KoD: Think Nintendofreak will be able to handle that guy on his own?

Retro: Wasn't your future self just here a second ago?

KoD: You answered my question with another question, how nice. Oh, wait, yeah, where is my future self?

Future KoD/FKoD/FOKD: Hiya. I went to the bathroom, just got a bit lost..heh.

~Several bullets, which all miss the group, puncture the walls above their heads. Jarod stumbles over some wooden crates and stands back up with his heavy gattling gun still equipped over his shoulder.~

Jarod: It took me quite some time to wobble over here with this monstrosity attached to me, but now I'm ready to shoot some new air holes into your heads!

Retro: Again with this? This is getting less and less amusing as time goes..

KoD: Why are there five?! Why, God, why!

~Suddenly..a Divine Intervention! I mean, Divine Interruption.~

Jesus: You heretics have already forgotten about me? What does a guy have to do to keep his part in an OG 'round here?

~Jesus snaps his fingers and Jarod's skin turns inside out. He falls to his knees, grabbing his face and screaming in agony.~

KoD: Praise Jesus?

Jesus: It's nice we got time to spend time to hang out in this life, 'cause I know we won't in the after life. Ha-HA! (Disappears)

~Everyone laughs sitcom style, while Jarod screams out at the top of his lungs while he bleeds to death on the floor.~

Nintendofreak: Are you guys done yet? We've got to go!

Retro: Go where?

~The lights go out, and atop some platform, Captain Drake Blackheart leaps out accompanied by a nice smoke effect.~

Drake: Straight to Hell!

~Cumulative gasp~

Drake: I don't tolerate any extra passengers on my ship once they've outstayed their welcome. But since I can't beat you guys, I suppose I'll just have to detonate this ship..

Retro: Whaaaat? Copout!

Drake: Ahahahaha! So long, everybody-

~Drake falls forward unconscious. Fera stands behind him holding a metal fish with an annoyed look on her face.~

Fera: Humph. Copout.

Retro: *Sighs* Exactly!

Fera: Just because I haven't done a whole lot doesn't mean I can't be useful. *Smiles*

KoD: Can we just take control of this ship already?

Nintendofreak: Totally, and I think it's high time we pay Clyde and Kane a little visit..

Retro: Look at you, Mr. Serious Emo.

Nintendofreak: ~Cut cut cut~ What? I'm cutting my...hair?

[PDG Headquarters]

CEO: Gentlemen, I'm afraid the world is lost. A being known as "AHHH HELP ME, HELP ME CRZZZT- Transmission Ended" is rampaging across the world, infecting all citizens with some crazy stuff that turns them into zombies.

Guy on the right: How do we combat such a threat?

CEO: We don't. We're already zombies you, see.

Guy: Oh no! I just remembered I left my wife in the middle of a football field guarding my precious brain collection!

CEO: I'm afraid your wife is gone, Charlie.

Guy/Charlie: Noooo! Hm, those brains are sounding pretty good now, though.

CEO: Indeed! Which is why I've scheduled a field trip to that football field. Come on guys, the bus awaits!

CEO: Hopefully the boys away from home will finish this war and at least carry on our legacy in space.

~Just outside earth, in a PDG flagship.~

PDG Soldier: Caimen here, no problems. Er I mean do you copy? Emergency maneuvers!!

~A large beam shoots across the plane of space and obliterates the PDG flagship. Legion warships line up and start their first assault on one of the PDG space stations.~

Commander Kane: I've waited too long for this.. ah, how good it feels to be on the field of battle again. Alright, everyone, listen up. We're about to storm the PDG's main space station which orbits the Earth. Make sure you leave none alive, you're fighting for Legion!

Soldiers: Hoorah! For Legion! For Clyde!

~Meanwhile~

Amy: How'd you guys escape!? You're not taking control of this ship!

Retro: I'll let Fera take this one.

~Visually stunning cat fight takes place.~

KoD: Okay, now to turn this puppy around.

~The Darkheart II drifts in space for a few moments before the boosters kick on. Nintendofreak pilots the ship, and spots Legion's insignia on a battered up warship...as well as a huge battle going on right behind it.~

Nintendofreak: Bringing it up on the monitor..

Retro: The PDG is being attacked? I didn't know that they were fighting anyone.

KoD/FKoD: Wait, what's going on?

Fera: *Leaps to her feet after defeating Amy* Our first space battle, yay!

Kane on the monitor: Oh good, Drake I take it you were succe-HOLY SHOE IT'S YOU GUYS!

Retro: Surp-

FKoD: Surprised?

Retro: Hey!

FKoD: Sorry, but it's hard not to do things like that when you know it's gonna happen >.>

Kane: What happened to Captain Blackheart?!

Nintendofreak: He's uh......Taking a nap?

Kane: God damnit.....No matter, you can't defeat Legion now! We've become more powerful than you can comprehend!

Nintendofreak: Oooooorrrr, we could just blow up your commanding ship which will make all the others retreat

Kane: You think it'll be that easy?

Nintendofreak: It worked in Pirates 3

Kane: We'll see if it works this time!

Retro: I-I don't even see the ship anywhere! I can only see battleships....

KoD: R-R-Retroooooo!

Retro: What?!

*FKoD and KoD point to the window, Retro focuses on the battle but can't seem to spot the flagship when an enormously HUGE flagship (possibly the size of a small state) flies into view, a large K with fire around it is the ensignia*

Nintendofreak: We-

Fera: Are so f***ed!

*Everyone stares at Fera*

KoD: Guys, we can't really focus on Fera and her hot cat fight she's having with Amy. We have a space battle to attend to.

Retro: Yo, I hope one rips the other one's shirt off and we see some fuckin' titties floppin' around and shit. Yeah, yeah.

KoD: ...Hm, point taken. Future me, does that happen?

FKoD: *just watching the fight* shh, you're distracting me, I missed the fight the first time.

KoD: Why?

FKoD: Because some guy tries to... oh, right *runs towards the back of Retro and slams his scythe's blade down on the wrist of an unknown person*

???: RAAAAAAH! ME SHANKIN' HAND! *passes out*

FKoD: Kay, there we go. Now back to the *turns to face the cat fight, but it's already over with Fera as the victor, standing triumphantly over Amy's knocked-out body with her shirt off* ...*sigh* I guess the fight isn't as important since I got to see 'em again. Anyway, Fera, put your shirt back on, we're not done yet.

Fera: Kay! *retrieves shirt from Amy's clenched hand and puts it back on*

Everyone: *disappointed groan*

Mariorocks: ...What the hell are you doing here, Everyone?

Everyone (the butler, lawl): Very sorry, sir Mariorocks, just wanted a peek at the fair Fera's bare bosoms *takes off in an escape pod*

FKoD: Right, anyway, Shanks and Amy are taken care of, Blackheart is knocked out, Raphiel got flameded and is... knocked out, too, as far as we know, and Jarod is dead, so... yeah, everything's aces on the pirate front. Although, it did seem odd and rather cruel of Jesus to do that to Jarod.

Jesus: *out of nowhere* You really think so? ...Ya know, you're right, I'll put him back to normal. *goes back to the deck where Jarod's corpse is*

The Protagonists: Nooooooooooooo!

Jesus proceeds to turn Jarod's skin outside in and revives him.

Jesus: There you are.

Jarod: Thanks, Jesus.

Jesus: My pleasure, Jesus AWAAAAAAAY! *flies off into space because he's Jesus*

Retro: *sigh* God damnit, Jesus...

KoD: Okay, so... Jarod is gonna try and kill us now... and then... ya know, we have the space battle to worry about. Ah well, we'll be fine, right future me?

FKoD: Just worry about staying alive.

Jarod: Oi! Yow're goin' ta' ave' ta' warry 'bout mour than thaht!

KoD: Why won't this guy die? ;_;

Retro: Oh sorry, did I forget to mention nobody really dies in this series?

KoD: WHAT? Even with all the drama and stuff, NOBODY DIES?!

Nintendofreak: Pretty much, yeah

FKoD: That's messed up O.o

Blackheart: And it's time for me to mess up your face, gents!

Raphiel: Not before I make sushi out of em'!

Shanks bleeding in the corner: AGH! ME SHANKIN' HAND!

*Ship rumbles as part of the hull explodes while fire slowly engulfs the entire vessel*

Nintendofreak: Shit! This ship isn't going to hold together much longer!

Blackheart: You're not going anywhere! You think you can just leave?! It doesn't work that way! I always get what I want, and you surviving this is not what I want!

*Blackheart knods to Jarod. Jarod charges at KoD and FKoD. The two brace themselves as the behemoth comes closer. When the duo get ready to strike Jarod, he catches them off balance by thrusting his sword into the air. As the two watch his glistening sword in the sky Jarod proceeds to dropkick them both while catching his sword from it's freefall. The two marshmallows skid on the ground, Jarod knees them a couple feet off the ground then proceeds to bombard the two with several punches and kicks, he then goes into an intense, virtical sword spin on the two helpless kirbys.*

Nintendofreak: Oh sh-*is punched by Raphiel*

Raphiel: I won't be going easy on you THIS time!

Nintendofreak: Believe me, it's no hassle!

*Nintendofreak draws his blade across the floor, then channels fire through the handle of the blade, setting the entire thing on fire.*

Raphiel: This, will be interesting

Nintendofreak: Come and get so-*Is rushed by Raphiel*

Retro watching the fights: Well, I guess that leaves us again huh?

Blackheart: Nah, that just leaves YOU! *draws pistol*

Retro: Hold that thought

*Retro takes off towards the control room*

Blackheart: No! Don't do it you idiot!

Retro: Sorry guy but I'm done with this shit!

*Retro presses the self-destruct button on the control panel*

Megaphone: Ship will self-destruct in 3 minutes

Blackheart: Heh heh heh heh heh......Hur heh ha heh heh hee ha heh haa!! Aaaahhhaaaaahahahaheehhahehaahahaaa! AHA! AHA! AHAHAHAAAHHHHHAAAAHAHAHAHAHEEHAAA!

Retro: Awkward.....

Blackheart: You fool! Even if you manage to escape this ship, you can't escape Legion! Your doom is inebitable! It's hilarious how you still strive for your pathetic existence! It really is quite funny! Hehaha!

Retro: It's better than staying here and waiting for death!

Blackheart: Waiting? No. You can't wait for death, you can only accept it. Heh heh

*Another earthquake-like rumble stikes through the ship as more of the hull and the deck is ripped appart. Retro runs toward and escape pod but is pinned against a wall by Blackheart*

Blackheart: See you in hell! Mwuahahah! heehaharhe!

*Blackheart draws back the hammer of his pistol, then stars pulling the trigger when the floor of the room collapses, sending Blackheart down to the depths of the ship and leaving Retro dangling on some twisted scrapmetal*

Retro: You first!

Blackheart: hehehehe no one kills me

*as blackheart pulls out a switch to detonate a bomb that would destroy everything, the bottom of the ship rips out, sucking blackheart into space*

Blackheart: **** **** ****

*blackheart floats through SPACE for miles since he has a jetpack and it activates making him go like a lot faster.*

Blackheart: ****

~Meanwhile~

Fontane: Im bored.

splicer: Aye aye capn.

Fontane: someone boot up my new ADAM machine i'm hungry.

*fontane gets inside of his ADAM inducer and gets like 500 X bigger*

Fontane: Idea

*fontane kills a splicer then turns him into a propeller and uses him to float closer towards a space colony that he sees*

Clyde: Whats that giant monster floating towards us.

Kane: It looks like a monster.

Trooper: Its Fontane and a jillion soldiers and like zombies and Alas statues.

clyde: F*ck

~elsewhere~

Uniyerp: *eats solar system that he was in*

Uniyerp: Uniburp. Now where yerp to next? I KNOW!?!

*Uniyerp reaches for a button that transports the league of murphys to him*

Colonel Sanders spit-takes: Commander! Something incredibly large and big is heading for us!

Clyde pounding fist on the arms of his chair: Bring it up on the monitor, damnit!

*The monitor shows a gargantuant asteroid full of buildings and skyskrapers*

Clyde: What in god's name.....

Colonel Sanders: Is that-is that the statue of liberty?!

*The camara pans to a decapitated statue of liberty in New York Harbor, Fontane is seen on his flagship*

Clyde spit-takes on Sanders: OH HAYLL NAW! BLAST HIM WITH OUR SUPER GIANT BLASTING LAZERS OF DOOM!

Colonel Sanders: Sir! I'm picking up high signals of ADAM and radiation! If we blow that rock up we'll send the hazardous materials across the Galaxy!

Clyde: God damnit! Nothing is going right today! Do something! Bring up a barrier or something! Don't let them get through!

Colonel Sanders: Sir! The warp-drive is ready!

Clyde: Perfect! Initiate Warp Speed! Our target: The Center of the Galaxy!

*The space rock gets ever so closer to the space station, but just before they collide the station vanishes in raindbow colored light*

*To the huge battle in space!*

*The DarkHawk II's engines blow out and half of the underside is torn off, the ship starts plunging downward into the center of the space battle*

KoD: Guys, now I think would be a good time to RUN!

Nintendofreak: Escape pods! They must have some!

Retro: I see them! *points to a giant sign pointing to some round pod-like objects, the sign reads "Escape Pods"*

Nintendofreak: What makes you think those are them?

Jarod: Oi! I ain't done with you yat!

Raphiel: Nor am I

*A large fiery, wooden pile of debris falls on them both*

Fera: Well that was convenient!

*The five hundle into the escape pod and jetison away from the burning ship*

*10 minutes later*

FKoD: Got any 5s?

Nintendofreak: Yahtzee!

KoD: I don't enjoy your company anymore >.>

*The pod rumbles and shakes and loud tearing of steel can be heard as the pod jolts to a stop. The door slowly opens and the five step outside into a corridor of a battleship*

Kod: Well this looks cozy

Soldier with exclamation mark over head: Intruders!

*Several heavily armed guards serround the group*

Retro: God-

Fera: Damnit!

*Everyone stares at Fera*

Fera: Why does everyone keep doing that?! Am I not allowed to talk?!

KoD with a bleeding nose: No, your top got caught on the door of the pod and kinda ripped off.... >.>

Fera covering herself: Look away! Look away!

High Ranking Soldier: Take them to Kane!

KoD: Future me, can you remember if this "Kane" fellow will help us?

FKoD: Hm.......Well I do remember waffles, waffles are gooooooood, mhmmmm

KoD: Yes, yes they are

OoC: And now for something... completely different. Also, whoops, I'm adding another character, bwah hahahahaha.

Back on Earth, ADAM zombies are plaguing the area and one guy is just bad enough to take these mothers on. Also, the zombies, he could take them on, too. Mother zombies are hard, though. DESPITE that, he can take them on because he's just that bad. This guy who is bad enough to accomplish this task is a man who goes by the name of Pole and he's one bad mother shut your mouth I'm only talkin' 'bout Pole we can dig it. Aww yeah. Anyway, he was a small 5'0 pasty white guy, but he was BAD. Didn't you see the Shaft reference? Bad... Despite being white, Pole grew up and actually survived on the streets and learned how to fight from a man in a wheelchair. He was surprisingly efficient despite his wheelchair-ness. He killed five men at the same time with his wheel chair handles. However, one day the wheelchair man was assassinated by zombie enthusiasts when Pole was just at the young, young age of 35. From that day, he swore revenge against all zombies and all who enthuse about them. Ever since, he continued training in the art of zombie eradication. He had to leave the YMCA after too many fatalities, but even AFTER that he continued his training. This brings us to today. He arms himself with 8 shotguns all strapped to his belt, which are covered by a large overcoat not unlike the various overcoats in The Matrix. He grabs one last shotgun and steps outside to the streets where the ADAM zombies are going crazy with the feasting. He flashes back to one moment with the wheelchair man when he was still alive and training him to fight. He said, "Pole, one day I'm gonna get assassinated by zombie enthusiasts and it's gonna be pretty bad. Oh, here they are now." Fueled by that memory, Pole rushes towards the ADAM zombies with a vengeance and prepares to destroy them all. However, he is quickly overtaken and devoured by the ADAM zombies.

OoC: Hehehe, thought that was gonna be another sub-plot to follow, didn't ya? Anyway.

The protagonists are being escorted to the command room or whatever, it's where Kane is.

KoD: Ya know, if Pole wasn't for the sole purpose of a joke, that mighta been a cool plotline.

FKoD: Yeah, but... too many. Good news is I'm almost at what I came back in time for.

KoD: I thought it was to save me.

FKoD: Well, yeah, but there's a part two to my time travel journey.

KoD: Ah.

They arrive in front of Kane.

Kane: Hello, Nintendofreak.

NF: Hello, Newman... Kane. Hello, Kane *narrows eyes*

Kane: You guys are now my prisoners... isn't that neat? Wait, why is this woman topless?

Fera: My shirt ripped and I haven't been able to get another one...

FKoD: Well, fret not, this is what I came back in time for. *hands Fera a shirt*

Fera: *puts it on* Thanks, KoD ^^

FKoD: Yes, no problem. I'll be off now. *cuts a space-time portal and vanishes inside of it*

Retro: I'm gonna miss him...

KoD: Really?

Retro: No, but he'll never know that.

KoD: Actually... meh.

Kane: Right, anyway *goes back to staring daggers at NF as NF has his eyes narrowed at Kane still*

NF: Kane this is boring.

*Nintendofreak punches kane into a shoot that goes down for miles*

Kane: WHAT THE HELL MAN!

NF: YOU SHALL NOT PASSSSSS

*Nintendofreak begins to bludgeon kane with a sword as kane pulls out a handgun*

NF: *slash slash stab* Die you Sob

Kane: *bang*

NF: I feel..... cold.

*Blood pours out of NFs brand new bullet wound, as Kane pulls out a shotgun*

Kane: Put up a fight, i lived in your shadow for this?

*Kane blasts NF with his shotgun, Nintendofreak is rittled with pellets.*

NF: Agghhhhh.

Kane: Hehehe.

*They reach the bottom of the shppt, it leads out into space. They both grab desperately to the side of the shoot, to prevent falling to their doom*

NF: Hey Kane.

Kane: What.

*Nintendofreaks sword floats into the black nothingness*

NF: You were always like a big brother.

Kane: Really?

*The strange mystery man floats up from the dark void, freezing time.*

Mystery man: ah, all the pieces fall into line. Nintendofreak and kane, clones..... I suppose Nintendofreak still has a role in this play.

*the mystery man pulls out a sword and sheathes it in Nintendofreaks belt, he floats away, as time resumes.*

Nintendofreak: Nope.

*nintendforeak takes out his sword and throws it at Kane*

Kane: Your sword... was in space...... but thats impossible..... I think I understand now. I understand it all.

* the sword stabs Kanes hand, knocking him into the void of space.*

Kane: Damn it.

*Kanes chest deflates, as all of his oxygen is sucked out of his lungs. Instantaneously his body freezes, he floats through space, dead*

NF: *sighs*

*Nintendofreak climbs his way back to the bridge to find that all the guards are dead in a circle with Retro, KoD and Fera standing in the middle*

Nintendofreak: Did I miss something?

*Slow clapping can be heard in the room, not exactly coming from a single place*

KoD: Oooook this is getting creepy

*A bit of evil chuckling can be heard under the sound of claps*

Retro: No, now it's getting creepy

*A secret door disguised as a wall opens and a troupe of Legion Termination Force (LTF) soldiers flood the room. Two larger troops that look like they're on steroids enter the room and make way for an abnormally tall and large man. The man is donned with purple and black, camoflauge pants, the legs are tucked under large black boots with purple Legion insignia on them. The man is wearing a spiked belt with a golden skull buckle, he is wearing a strange purple and black baret like hat with a golden Legion insignia stitched on it. To complete his outfit he is wearing black sunglasses, a black leather jacket with spike studs on the shoulder, the jacket has purple stitching. Oh and don't forget about the long and flowing, ripped red cape and steel glove on his right hand that ends at his elbow.*

Nintendofreak: K-Kane?

Kane: Bingo!

Nintendofreak: But you were just-I just-you were-you're...

Kane: Dead? Nah, that was just a decoy hypnotized to think he was me, pretty ingenius, eh?

Nintendofreak: No, now tell me why you're fighting with these guys!

Kane: They got in the way of Lord Clyde's plans, so it's my job to exterminate these rebels, It really is a great job

Retro: Figures the PDG would'nt stand by as you destroyed the Earth!

Nintendofreak: PDG?

KoD: Who?

Kane: Ah, so you know them....

Retro: I might have help them on some jobs once or twice

Fera: Who are they?

Kane: They're rebellious pests that I'm going to squish! But not before I deal with you!

Nintendofreak: Not before I take you out first!

*Nintendofreak charges at Kane with sword in hand and prepares to deliver a fatal blow to the head before Kane kicks him through the ceiling to the upper levels*

Kane: Take care of them while I deal with this worm!

LTF Officer: Right away sir!

*Kane leaps through the ceiling as a man garbed in black military padding and a mysterious helmet that covers his face enters the room, he holds a very large and powerful semi-automatic rifle*

LTF Officer: Alright men! Guns at the ready!

*The soldiers raise their weapons at Retro, Fera and a traumatized KoD*

KoD: What did I do to deserve this?! ;_;

LTF Officer: Aim!

*The soldiers turn on their lazer targeting systems (LTS). The three huddle together and brace themselves*

LTF Officer: Fire!

*The LTF Officer quickly turns to his side and blasts three troops away, then he pulls a handgun from behind him and shoots blindly behind him which actually acuratelly hits seven soldiers in the face and heart. He then turns to the three heroes and blasts away with his shotgun. Retro, Fera and KoD are amazed to find themselves unharmed as several soldiers fall to the ground, dead. The two larger soldiers point their weapons at the LTF Officer who pulls out a remote and pressed a large red button that detonates two mines behind them. The two larger soldiers fall down dead, turns out the mines were filled with poison darts.*

KoD: What the cheesedodle just happened?! O.o

*The LTF Officer tears off his uniform to reveal a blonde haired man wearing a red, padded suit and yellow scarf, a PDG insignia is on his shoulder, he is garbed in all types of badges and rank insignias*

Retro: Andrew?!

Andrew: It's been awhile, Retro.

KoD: What the fudge-taco is going on?!

Andrew: We don't have time to explain! The guards will sound the alarm soon and we need to get to the power core!

*Andrew busts down another secret door*

Andrew: Fallow me!

*Retro runs after Andrew while Fera drags the confused KoD along*

OoC: Bleh, it feels weird posting this again, I wished I saved the original.

KoD: Fera, let go of me.

Fera: *lets go* Right, you can walk, I guess; no need to drag you.

KoD: No, it's not that. I don't belong here, so I'm leaving before I get too involved. So, tell the others so they're not confused, please.

Fera: Alright. Well, thanks for the shirt... even though it was future you.

KoD: Heh, right, no problem. Well, goodbye.

Fera: Bye.

*KoD cuts a portal and starts to go in it, but remembers something*

KoD: Let no strand of time go untied.

*KoD closes the portal and opens a new one leading to the ship*

KoD: Yeah, sorry, this is way too over-powered for this OG, you'll get it back when it's necessary *takes scythe and disappears into the closing portal*

*KoD comes back out on the deck of ship where his past self is about to get ripped in half*

KoD: *sigh* I wish I coulda killed you *charges up crash and hurls it at Jarod*

*fast forward to when FKoD got stuck in the freezer*

KoD: What an odd place for a shirt... ah well, this'll fit Fera; I'll save it for when she needs it.

*The strands of time are tied, woo. With that said, when FKoD left, it was going back to his own dimension so... no bringing him back, please*