~Kane has been outfitted with a number of cybernetic abilities. His muscle mass has increased significantly (almost as much as Clyde). Kane is almost completelly covered with incredibly durable pixite armor-skin. Pulsating tubes protruding from his neck, torso, spine and right fore-arm cirulate a modified version of pixels throughout his body. His teeth have also transformed into fangs.~

Kane: Prepare the troops! I sence several powerful lifeforms aboard that station! Outfit every soldier with our new weapons!

Captain Crunch: Yes sir! We'll crush that abomination against god!

~The Captain turns to leave the room before Kane stops him~

Kane: Captain

Captain Crunch: Yes si-~Captain Crunch cries out in pain and gasps for breath. Kane has inserted his hand into the Captain's chest. Kane pulls his face over to Crunch's ears~

Kane: Do you know the best part of being an "abomination".~Kane tears out the Captain's still beating heart, and squeezes it in his hand until it becomes a smoldering pile of ash~ I can be fixed!

*******

~Now on the sleeker, more heavily armed Darkhawk III. Shanks with a cybernetic arm takes the helm. Amy boringly dazes out into space. Raphiel tirelessly cleans and polishess his katana. Drake sits at his large throne-like chair and seems to be contemplating something. Jarod, with much larger, full-body armor gulps a giant pitcher of beer and slams it on the table infront of him~

Jarod: It ain't gonna be long until we arrive at the CIA station, I say it's time tah celebrate

Blackheart: ~backhands Jarod~ Don't get cocky! Legion fighters are probably tracking us down as we speak!

Jarod: What're the odds that they'll catc-

Raphiel: They already have!

~The other four turn to stare at Raphiel who simply nods his head~

Blackheart: Damn! They found us sooner than I thought! Jarod, Raphiel, come with me to the deck! We'll greet our friends! Amy, man the artillery! Shanks stay at the helm, try and hide us in that nearby asteroid belt!

~Blackheart points to an asteroid belt orbitting a small green-orange planet~

~Shanks grasps the wheel firmly with his cybernetic arm and spins left, heading straight for the defenseless Partur. The dozens of Legion ships trailing them do the same, while three pull up beside them. One eventually lands on the small pad set up outside on deck. The hatch to the ship opens, and a small group of Legion soldiers emerge. A slightly taller and intimidating one steps out in front of all of them and stares at each pirate in the eyes for a few seconds. Jarod and Raphiel both look away, but Darkheart stares through him without flinching. Finally, the man speaks up.~

Man: I am Captain Globe, of Legion. May I speak to you… Captain to Captain?

Blackheart: Frankly, I can never see myself as the type of captain who kisses the ass of his commanding officer. Don't bring me down to your level. I am a proud captain of an honorable group of mercenaries, not some suck-up.

Globe: Well in the case of-

Blackheart: Now, I have no problems talking to you, of course. But I'm not offering you a seat or anything. Now then, state your business and leave.

Globe: I'm afraid I can't-

Blackheart: Or if it happens to get to the case where you want to take us all in for defying Clyde, you can tell him yourself that we always go for the job with the highest dollar. Policy, I'm afraid. Then again, you probably wouldn't make it off this ship if that was the case.

Globe: I should inform you that I am-

Blackheart: You can try to take us in, but I'm afraid your group is doomed, “Captain”.

Globe: *Exhales slowly* As much as I’d love to play along with this game, I’m a man of business. An underling of a greater power, you see. They supply me with these ships, *whips head back to the direction of the brigade* and expect me to use them if necessary. As it stands, you are in no position to threaten me, as I easily have enough firepower to blast you to kingdom come. Now you should be asking yourself, “Is this really what I want?” and I’m sure you care about your crew, too. Now then, I can let this slip by if you hand yourself in…~snicker~ as well as fifty thousand.

Jarod: Why, you…!*Attempts to rush Globe, but is held back by Drake’s arm.*

Blackheart: You really expect that of me?

Globe: I’m merely suggesting that if you value the lives of your ‘honorable’ crew, you would save them by any means. I’m actually being pretty soft on you, Captain, Clyde wanted all of you murdered for betrayal, but with the money I might just be persuaded to tell him they all died on the trip home. I’ll see if I can’t get you a quick execution, too. Well, what do you say?

Blackheart: You’re a pitiful man, Mr. Globe. A real captain wouldn’t sell himself to save his crew, he would save them, with honorable fighting and tactics. And with those on our side, your threats also appear to be…empty. But mine however…*pulls out a large pistol that somehow stretches out to about one meter* are not.

Globe: You would point a pistol at me? Hah! Do you realize how much of a suicide effort this is?

Blackheart: The moment you stepped on Blackheart’s ship is the moment you signed your own death warrant. *Loads pistol with his thumb* Now then… I don’t have to win this…just make sure that you lose.

Globe: *Raises hand* Open fire on my command! Ready…!

~Falls backwards with a bullet to his head.~

Blackheart: Fire!

~Jarod and Raphiel both take out their own guns and massacre the soldiers still standing around the dead body of the Captain. A few remaining take out their blades and rush the group, who drop their guns and do the same. Blackheart intercepts a few slices and trips the soldier running at him, and cuts him before he falls. Raphiel crouches and lunges forward past two guards, who suddenly fall over while he retracts his katana and stands. Jarod throws one dagger at the eye of a soldier rushing him, and then falls on the ground grabbing at it. Jarod walks past him and pulls the dagger out as the body goes limp. Suddenly, the ships trailing the Darkhawk III open fire on the ship.~

Blackheart: You can fire now Amy!

Amy: Aye, Captain!

~From below the deck, a slot opens from the back of the ship and one large cannonball-turret gun peaks out. Amy carefully lines the crosshairs with amazing accuracy in a few seconds and blasts a few ships soon after. A few returning lasers dent the outside of the ship, and destroy sections of the deck. Blackhearts orders the group below decks immediately, and they all retreat. Meanwhile, Shanks is doing his best to navigate through what was now starting to become a nasty asteroid field. Amy picks off a few more, but the numbers are staggering. Blackheart rushes up beside her seat.~

Amy: The asteroids are covering them as they are us, Captain!

Blackheart: Save the ammo for when they get close, Amy. Shanks will have us through this in no time. They however, do not have as experienced pilots like we do. Let their cover be their reaper!

Amy: Aye, Captain.

~Blackheart runs past Jarod and Raphiel, who are each fixing some dents and damages to special parts of the ship. Blackheart approaches the helm and stands besides Shanks, who can even turn on a dime to avoid the smallest asteroid successfully.~

Blackheart: We’ll have no choice but to land on that planet.

Shanks: Aye, Captain. By the way, there are a few colonies scattered on that planet, should I maybe choose one and land on its outskirts?

Blackheart: Aye, that sounds like a good idea to me. Just make sure we don’t attract any unwanted attention. It looks like we’ll have to wait there until I can make contact with the CIA.

Shanks: We owe the recovery of the blueprints to your fine leadership, Captain.

Blackheart: What I wouldn’t give to slice the throats of those…Epic Goers.

Shanks: Aye…sir?

Blackheart: But what’s done is done, now let’s land on this planet and seal the deal as quickly as we can.

~The Darkhawk III enters the atmosphere of the planet, with few Legion vessels trailing them. The ships that are left over are quickly picked off by Amy before they reach the atmosphere. The Darkhawk III then enters the planet and lands near a small town.~

***

~Before the Darkhawk III was spotted, and even before they came near the planet, the PDG craft piloted by Retro landed down on Partur. They hid the ship on the outskirts and trekked a short distance across pleasant grass fields with the winds on their backs until they got to a town.

This was actually Retro’s home town of Widget, a relatively small settlement on the outside, but underground were large caverns made entirely out of metal and mechanical parts. On the surface were entrances to the tunnels, which resembled houses of no particular shape, also made of mechanical parts, with engines near them. Around the town were small cliffs with fields of tall grass around them, with water seeping out of the insides of the cliffs. A small stream ran through the town, and a water mill was also present at the site. At the back of the town was a hill that lead up to a large, and possibly the only house above ground.

The group of three walked into town with a few awkward stares greeting them. Retro, beforehand, removed his pixel armor, save for his one arm, and KoD hid his scythe as best he could. They were in no way here to fight. A seemingly older man walks up to the ground with a short cane and simple clothes, stained with grease. His face somehow, is spotless, save for wrinkles of age, and a small beard. A small group of people walk behind him.~

Old man: My! We certainly weren’t expecting visitors to our town this year. Are you with the PDG, son?

Retro: Um, yes. We’re all with the PDG.

Old man: Oh ho! Good, good then. I suppose you came to inspect the town early again, hm? Well I’ll have you know we’ve been doing fine as of late, just about the best I think we’ve ever been doing! Those new energy components you’ve supplied us with give us great hopes for the future of the Partur settlement.

Retro: Thanks, we do our best. Glad to hear you’re holding up okay here. Say…that house on the hill, does that belong to you?

Old man: Hm? Oh, yeah. That house has belonged to the elder of this settlement since the prior family died out.

Retro: I see.

Old man/ Elder: Something about you looks familiar, lad. Have you been here before? I don’t recall ever seeing you or your friends here for inspection here.

Fera: Retro, just tell them why you’re here!

Elder: Retro…? As in Retro Belmont of the Belmont house?

~The crowd behind the man all seem to gasp at the name.~

Retro: Yeah, that’s me. I spent the first fourteen years of my life here. Forgive me for not telling you sooner, I wasn’t sure if I wanted the attention or not.

Elder: But for the longest time this town has thought all of the succeeding family members to that name were long gone!

Retro: I owe this town an explanation. Could I maybe speak to you in your house, Elder?

Elder: It would be my pleasure, my boy. You’re always welcomed in your family mansion.

Retro: Thank you, but it’s not mine any more. Let’s just head up and talk for a while, I hope my friends and I won’t be a burden on you.

Elder: You’re welcomed to stay as long as you like. Any Belmont is.

~They all walk up to the house, and after getting settled down and treated to drinks and dinner, Retro approaches the subject once more.~

Retro: I’m sure there has been a lot of confusion over my family name, but maybe I can explain what happened back when I disappeared in 2005.

Elder: Ah… I remember the day well, too. Or rather, the day you were born, it was when-

Retro: When my parents both died…together. I grew up without them in this house with a few guardians to keep tabs on me. It was a simple life, I suppose. I remember when I was fourteen the PDG came for one of their check-ups. I dreamed of a life in space, so I snuck on board one of their ships and became a Harborer. Apparently a lot of people in the PDG know of the Belmonts, so giving me an opportunity like that at a young age was possible.

Elder: Mmm, I was worried sick when you left, my boy. But it seems as though you’ve found your place in the universe without the guidance of parents. But…I’m afraid your memory must be a little hazy, son.

Retro: What do you mean?

Elder: As I remember you were not the only child of the Belmonts. They had three sons in total, I believe.

Retro: They did!?

Elder: *Nods* Indeed, one died when he was about five years old. And apparently the following day your mother gave birth to twins. You were one of those babies. She…died after that birth.

Retro: Funny…I don’t think anyone ever told me about that.

Elder: Your mother…Elise was it? Ah yes, she has been acting strange for those nine months. Or so I would assume, you see, not many people saw that much of her the time before her first born died. Your father, too, wouldn’t speak much to anyone.

Retro: The first son…what was his name?

Elder: I can’t remember it that well. I think it was something like Tort or Torte or something. It was a strange name. Much like yours! Hah hah!

KoD: *Sips some soup* Well, he’s got you there!

Retro: *Glares at KoD*

KoD: Erm…>.> *Goes back to sipping soup*

Fera: You really don’t remember, Retro?

Retro: Not anyone named Torte. What about the other son? My twin?

Elder: Well I believe his name was Orter. Ah yes, that’s right, it WAS Orter!

KoD: *Chokes on soup and spits it all over the wall* Orter!? I remember that name from the old scripts! He’s a pirate, right?

Fera: …Unbelievable.

Retro: But I was an only child! How could that have happened? HOW!?

Elder: I’m amazed you remember your fourteen years here as being an only child. You and Orter did nearly everything together. He even disappeared right around the time you did!

Retro: But the first time I met Orter was when we were both employed by the PDG in space. For a while we both were researching pixels aboard a space station. I must have just forgotten him…but according to you, that was the second time that has happened. Just what was going on with him?

Elder: It was a strange time for your family. It all seemed to revolve around a meteor that crashed into our planet beforehand.

Retro: Meteor…?

KoD: I think that soup went right though me…ugh. *Turns bright red*

Fera: I think it’s time we all went to bed anyway. Right, Retro?

Retro: Yeah…sounds like a good idea to me. Thank you for the dinner, it was delicious.

Elder: Any time, my boy. Please, make yourselves at home.

KoD: Don’t mind if I do! *Barfs all over the floor*

Elder: I’ve prepared your rooms for the evening.

Fera; Come on, Kirby, I’ll heal you up in the other room. Come on, Retro.

Elder: Oh ho, goodnight!

Retro: Goodnight. Thank you again.

~They turn in for the night, and a few hours later, a familiar pirate ship lands in the outskirts of town.~

***

~Leaven wakes up in his room to an alarm. He quickly runs outside his room to find guards running up and down the hall. He seizes one and screams at him.~

Leaven: YOU. WHAT IS HAPPENING?!

Soldier: Sir! An attack, sir! It’s Legion, sir! They’ve crashed an entire flagship into our base, sir! And now they’re everywhere, sir!

Leaven: Where is Strives and Nintendofreak?!

Soldier: I don’t know, sir! They were still resting in the infirmary when the ship came, sir!

Leaven: And where did the ship crash!?

Soldier: Near the infirmary, sir!

~Leaven swears to himself and drops the soldier to the ground. He dresses in his armor as quickly as he can and runs out of his room and down the hallway. A group of soldiers are battling another group from Legion. They’re both having standard gun combat until Leaven leaps over the group of CIA guards and crashes into the group of Legion soldiers. He grabs one and throws him into more of them as they round the corner, and then keep running towards the infirmary, slicing through soldiers as they approach him.

A small group of Legion soldiers are patiently waiting in the elevator, and then when they finally reach their floor, the double doors open to reveal an enraged Leaven who massacres them before they even have a chance to move. Leaven presses the button of the floor with the infirmary on it, and waits patiently. A dazed soldier that Leaven somehow missed before rises and brushes himself off. He looks up at Leaven, who is glaring right at him, and then narrows his eyes further.

The elevator doors open, and Leaven steps out with a big mess of blood splattered against the wall behind him. He sprints right for the infirmary but stops dead in his tracks when a huge explosion comes from inside it and out the door and into the hallway. He curses loudly again and leaps into the room despite the flames and looks around frantically. He sees no one in the room, save for a large figure covered in blankets on the floor. He runs up to it and shakes it, then removes the covers. Puzzled, he looks at the figure again, but this time it rises and looks at him with menacing eyes. It towers over him and grabs his throat with a dark hand.~

Kane: He used fire on me. I don’t like fire, and now I don’t like you. *Throws Leaven through the wall and out into the hallway.*

~Leaven staggeringly rises up and looks through the hole his body made when the beast tossed him. Kane jumps through too, leaving a bigger hole, and tackles Leaven to the floor. Leaven reaches for an axe but can’t reach it. Kane then rolls to his back while holding Leaven, and then using both of his legs sends him flying across the room. Leaven lands with a large thud and tries once more to wield his axe, but Kane lands right on top of him, making Leaven send out a wail of pain. Kane is about to stab him through the back of the neck when another fireball hits him square in the face. Kane staggers backwards and grasps his face, and looks up with hate. Nintendofreak stands facing him from further down the room, readying another fireball.~

Leaven: You! Where is Strives!?

Nintendofreak: She wasn’t in the room with us, if that’s what you’re asking.

Leaven: You don’t know where she is?!

Nintendofreak: She left shortly before this brute came into my room.

Leaven: Damn it all! *Gets up with his axe now in hand and limps past Nintendofreak and down the hallway* I’ll be back, think you can handle him by yourself?

Nintendofreak: Yeah, no problem. Thanks for the hospitality by the-

~But Leaven was already gone.~

Kane: That fire stuff is really pissing me off!

*Nintendofreak charges a fireball.*

Kane: Stop that now!

*Nintendofreak shoots the fireball into Kane.*

Kane: Dude! What did I just say?!

Nintendofreak: Uh-

*Kane roars and rushes forward, punching at Nintendofreak. Nintendofreak grabs him by the first and spins him around then punches at him. Kane blocks the punch, so Nintendofreak kicks at him. Kane catches his foot and then flings him into the ceiling. However, as Nintendofreak descends he spins his legs around, drill-kicking Kane and knocking him over.*

Nintendofreak: Let's do this!

*Kane picks up a glass bottle of flowers and shatters it, then begins stabbing forward with the remaining sharp shard of glass. Nintendofreak begins deftly dodging it; however, one stab reaches his shoulder.*

Nintendofreak: Whoa baby, that smarts!

Kane: It better, I'm an evil clone of you or something!

Nintendo: You stabbed me with glass! You know how I feel about glass!

*Nintendofreak then manages to dodge the next stab and grab the glass shard, then begins channeling heat into it.*

Nintendofreak: Hate it! Hate. HATE!

*The glass melts into sand.*

Kane: No!

*Kane then punches Nintendofreak, distracted by his overwhelming hate. Kane picks up a harpoon that was in the medical wing for medical purposes too complex to be disclosed, and prepares the finishing blow.*

Nintendofreak: Ah shrack.

???: Don't worry! The CIA back up agents are here!

Nintendofreak: Oh good! Finally some competent soldiers who can help me!

*Fred, GORE and El Mundo rush in and do karate poses.*

Nintendofreak: ...Alright, finish me off Kane.

Kane: You're just jealous because I finished my citizenship tests!

*El Mundo does a sumo pose and rushes forward, knocking over Kane. Fred then bends over behind Kane so that he trips over Fred. Finally GORE leaps forward and begins wildly pummeling Kane with his fists.*

Nintendofreak: I give them a 6 out of 10. Why did my best friend betray me for the dark side?

*Suddenly a blackish ball of fire erupts and knocks GORE, El Mundo and Fred back.*

El Mundo: We can't beat him like this, senors!

Fred: Nintendofreak is the chosen one. It is only logical that we proceed with his imminent arrival, as soon as humanly possible.

Nintendofreak: This shoulder wound's kinda holding me back!

GORE: I'll try giving him the punch of life! (punches Nintendofreak) ...Nah, that didn't work. ...Hey, I got a better idea!

*Suddenly, the ska version of Take Me On begins playing. GORE, Fred and El Mundo dance along with the music. With the power of these elite beats, Nintendofreak soon climbs to his feet and motions for Kane to approach.*

Nintendofreak: Alright, you freak-ass clone! This ends here!

That night the three of them dreamed and they were all equally crazy.

(Inside Retro's dream)
Retro is cowering on the ground while a giant Rocky head laughs at him.

Retro: Stay away, giant Rocky head!

Rocky: Never! Bwah hahahaha!

Just then, Tigershark men with torpedo stomachs and flamethrowers come out of nowhere and start jumping onto Rocky's face.

Rocky: Nooooo! I don't like either one of your species! *floats away at breakneck speed with the tigershark men on him*

Retro: ...Hm.

With an abrupt transition, Retro sits at a table with Exaih.

Retro: Exaih, your sacrifice won't go in vain! I WILL get revenge on Legion!

Exaih: That's General! *smack*

Retro: Why'd you hit yourself?

Exaih: I was falling asleep. Now, I know you want your revenge, but don't let it consume you.

Retro: Why not?

Exaih: Because bad stuff will happen if you do. Don't you watch TV and movies?

Retro: Right, fine, I'll get revenge on Legion, but it won't consume me.

Exaih: Good, now you need to focus on more pressing issues.

Retro: Like what?

Exaih: Like the group of CACTUS MEN WITH JAVELINS BEHIND YOU!

Retro: *turns around to face them* Oh no! Why are they on fire?!

Exaih: I don't know!

(Retro wakes up from his dream in a cold sweat)
Retro: Damn cactus men... *looks up and out the window* One day...

(inside Fera's dream)
A house is there with a white picket fence and the entire scene is in black and white. Inside the house, Retro is getting ready for his job complete with suit and tie. Fera looks like a 50's housewife.

Fera: Here's your eggs, dear.

Retro: Thanks, honey. *looks at watch* Oh, golly gee, I'm gonna be late for work.

Fera: You better hurry then.

Retro: Right *kisses Fera goodbye* See ya later.

Retro leaves and goes out the door while Fera stays in the doorway and waves at Retro while he pulls out of the driveway and heads off to work.

Fera: Oh, better check on Junior.

She goes to Junior's room and checks on him in his crib.

Fera: Ah, you look fine *sigh* Life is perfect...

The roof of the house flies off and the sky is black with tornadoes EVERYWHERE.

???: Your child... GIVE him to me!

Fera: *grabs Junior* No, he's mine!

A shadowed figure appears before Fera with a claw outstretched.

???: You have no choice, my dear... Sooner or later, he'll belong to ME!
(Fera wakes up from her dream in a cold sweat as well. She looks down at her stomach and caresses it, fearing for her future child's safety)

(In KoD's dream)
KoD looks around in a black void.

KoD: Huh? Man, I wanted a boob dream...

Booming voice: Don't be so perverted!

Giant hand comes from above and pimpsmacks KoD

KoD: Gah, Christ!

Booming voice: Close, but no.

KoD: Aw cmon, God, I came back here legally; one of your angels threw me.

God: I'm not here for that. I have a mission for you.

KoD: Eh? I'm not just gonna be a comic relief character? o.o

God: No, this concerns a wandering, evil spirit that has eluded my reapers. This is a final reaping mission for you.

KoD: Hm... yeah, alright, who am I going after?

God: You'll know.

KoD: Right, but what if I don't?

God: You will.

KoD: Right, but what if I-

God: You WILL! *pimpsmack*

(KoD wakes up from his dream)
KoD: Gah... I wonder if that was real...

A giant hand comes through the ceiling and pimpsmacks KoD

KoD: Right, gotcha x.x

~The group of three sleep soundly for the majority of the night, until about an hour prior to dawn, when a huge boom rocks the house. Fera wakes up immediately and looks past her curtains outside. Retro tosses his covers aside and falls to the floor, still half asleep, while Jed sits up and yawns, spreading his huge Kirby mouth to cover about 75% of his body.~

Retro: *Still faced down in the carpet* What's going on, dear?

Fera: It's pitch black outside, but I thought I saw a flash of light at the same time as the explosion.

KoD: Explosions... is that all? Just wake me up when we're in real danger. *Falls back asleep*

~The door to the room opens and the village elder comes in.~

Elder: Oh, sorry about that Mr. Belmont, no need to worry, they've only returned for supplies.

Retro: *Gets up* What do you mean 'they'? What supplies?

Elder: No time to explain now, I've got to go meet them downstairs, they'll likely be at my doorstep any-

~A seriously loud pounding is coming from the front door in the foyer. The elder sighs and immediately heads downstairs. The group follow him.~

Elder: I'm coming, I'm coming, blast it!

~The Elder opens the front door, and inside steps a decent sized, dark skinned man, with cropped hair and a light mustache. On the top of his head is a blood soaked headband. He wears light armor and a dark purple cape. Behind him two men armed with heavy weaponry stand to either side of him.~

Man: I'm here for the supplies your village owes us for this month, sir. Point me to them so my men and I can leave without any trouble.

Elder: Oh...hm, I was confused, is it already that time of the month, Lando?

Lando: *Sigh* Yes, and if you expect your village to stay pretty I suggest you just speed this up and give my men the supplies we need.

Retro: *Steps forward* Now hold on a minute.

~The men each point their guns at Retro, who grunts and continues anyway.~

Retro: You can't just take the supplies the PDG gave this town!

Elder: No no, it's fine, they need them more than we do, Mr. Belmont.

Lando: I cannot say I approve of this man's behavior. Listen here, we're not thieves- I am a Lieutenant for the CIA, and for several years now we've been fighting a battle against forces of Legion on this planet.

KoD: The CIA's cheap enough not to send supplies to their own forces? Dude, weak! *Whistles and looks away as the guns point to him instead.*

Lando: ...The CIA doesn't know we're here. Thanks to the asteroid belt orbiting the planet there's no way to make contact to the base. And we very well can't fly into space with tanks and other land based units. And to stay alive we depend on some of the supplies sent by the PDG to this village. In return, we protect them from the raids of the Legion forces.

Retro: (Why are there so many troops here on a small planet? It makes no sense.)

Elder: It's true, the reason the PDG comes down here instead of dropping supplies through the atmosphere is because of the asteroid belt. Alas, no one on this planet can contact anyone outside of the atmosphere.

Lando: We have reason to believe that the Legion troops cannot make contact either, but they've taken several villages past the mountains already. Back when I was with the CIA under the leadership of the third Commander, we fought for justice. Who knows what's happening to them now.

KoD: Anything but that. >.>

Retro: They attacked a PDG station and kidnapped our friend, but we don't know their location, so finding him is currently impossible.

Lando: It seems the ways of honor have escaped the CIA. I hope you find your friend some day, to be sure. But, I think we've talked enough about this, now where are the supplies? We never know when Legion will attack us again.

~The elder leads Lando and his men outside, to a small, erm, large shed located behind the manor. Meanwhile, the three stand in the foyer, waiting.~

*OoC: The boom heard at the beginning was more like an exploding flare that the CIA troops used to tell the villagers that they were coming. Aw snap, more background knowledge!

KoD: I'm bored. Can we go back to sleep now?

Fera: Yeah, there's probably nothing more we can do here. Coming, Retro?

Retro: I was thinking...

KoD: You fool!

Retro: Maybe we should help the CIA.

Fera & KoD: You fool!

Fera: Why would we do that? They're the CIA for crying out loud!

Retro: It's not the same CIA we hate, but an old group who have apparently been in operation here before the new group came to power. And if they're trying to protect this town, we should help defend it!

Fera: So much for just 'stopping by' on your home planet...

KoD: These guys weren't here when you grew up here, right Retro?

Retro: Naw, I don't recall armed men demanding supplies during my childhood. This town is more peaceful than anything I know of.

Fera: So that means that the CIA must have came here soon after you left, and then changed? The same thing could be said for Legion, to an extent. *Strokes chin interestingly*

Retro: All I know is that the town's in danger because of Legion, and if they're the bad guys here, we gotta stop them.

Elder: *Walks into the room and closes the front door behind him* Well well, so sorry about that. Off to bed with you all now.

Retro: Wait a second! Do you know where their camp is?

Elder: Come again? Are my beds not comfortable enough for you, Mr. Belmont?

Retro: Er, sorry, it's not that. I actually wanted to talk to their leader a little bit more.

KoD: Well I certainly thought the beds were too hard.

Elder: They usually camp on the outskirts of town, to the north. I'll mark it on your map!

Retro: Sorry, we don't have a map.

Elder: Then how am I gonna mark it?! Here, hold out your hand, Mr. Belmont.

Retro: Aw god it's cold! So cold! Do you have to use a permanent marker!?

Elder: That way you'll really remember it! *Wheezing laughter*

Fera: Thank you for having us.

Elder: Oh that reminds me, I gotta check the video tapes...

Fera: What?

Elder: Er nothing! Have a blast talking to them and what not! Nice to see you again, Mr. Belmont, you and your friends are welcome back any time!

Retro: Whatever. *All leave*

***

Blackheart: Damn it! *Slams fists on a keyboard, smashing it.*

Jarod: Captain, are the transmissions still not connecting?

Blackheart: No, and I spilled some more damn coffee on my pants! Jarod, napkin!

Shanks: Hey, look at that there. *Points onto the screen to a weak connection being made with a CIA signal.*

Blackheart: Ah, they're here too arrgh they? Establish a transmission with their commander, we've got to let them know what we've been doing.

~The transmitter makes a few dialing sounds, and the other end is picked up by Lando.~

Lando: Lieutenant Lando of the CIA speaking, who is this?

Blackheart: Ah, Lieutenant. The name's Drake Blackheart of the Darkstar Pirates. My crew and I have been working under your leader's supervision, and we have retrieved his blueprints for the weapon as instructed.

Lando: I don't know of your mission or your boss. My men and I haven't been in contact with the CIA HQ since 2014.

Blackheart: 'Zat so? So you're marooned here, is that it? Well I'm afraid we have no more business with you. Nice speaking to you, Lieutenant.

Lando: Wait! If you can travel off of this planet, can you tell the CIA that we're stranded here?

Blackheart: Sorry, that ain't in the contract. However if the right price was offered...

Lando: Please, Captain. We have little money, and I'm sure that the leader of the CIA would surely give you a bonus for telling him that we're here.

Blackheart: Hm, I 'spose. Are you sure he'll give us extra? I'm not one to haggle with a man who wants to destroy planets and space stations with a weapon.

Lando: What! Weapons such as those are strictly prohibited in the CIA!

Blackheart: Wise up to the new rules, Lieutenant, I think you have much to catch up on.

Lando: ...

Blackheart: I'll tell him you're here, you have my word as a Captain. Arrrgh.

Lando: Very well. As long as they come.

~The transmission cuts off.~

Lando: What's happened to the CIA...



~Meanwhile, on the far side of the planet of Partur, the new Legion headquarters sits. Inside a chamber underground, a large man sits in a throne like chair. A butler stands next to him with a grenade launcher strapped to his back, and a plate with empty glasses balanced perfectly in his hand. The man in the chair is garbed in heavy fur stained black, a gas mask over his face with a bowler hat atop his head.~

Man: Hyuck hyuck! Is it Wednesday already? Let's pillage some more towns while I can feel the passion of war beating my heart. Winslow!

Butler: Yes, sah.

Man: Bring me my glass of fruit juice! I want it squeezed right by the hands of our prisoners. Oh, and make them wash their HANDS this time!

Butler: Right away, mastah. *Bows and leaves.*

Man: Inner Monologue time! *Takes out a tape recorder and holds it up to his face* Ahem, today the great general...no wait let me start that over, His MAJESTY General Commander King Cosbine will take the fight to the unsuspecting CIAsses once again. We'll crush them into an extra fine powder, and make them into a nice drink! And after we drink those drinks, we'll wizz on their makeshift graves! HHOOOOAAAHAHAHAHAHA!

Butler: Your drink, sah.

Cosbine: Very good Winslow. My compliments to the chefs. *Sips once and spits it out* ...Execute them!

Butler: Very good, sah. How did it taste?

Cosbine: Excellent! Waahahahaaahaaa! EXECUTE THEM.

Butler: At once, sah.

Cosbine: One more thing Winslow, prepare my personal copter, I shall be joining my brave soldiers on the front this day. But by on the front I mean ABOVE the front. Also bring my personal masseuse, will you? My neck aches from all of this stress.

***
~Later, in the CIA tent on the outskirts of town.~

Retro: ...And that's why we need to fight with you, Lieutenant.

Lando: I see no reason why we shouldn't let you into our ranks. We're running low on manpower thanks to Cosbine seizing nearby towns. Hopefully today we can turn the tide in this war, but only long enough until help arrives from the CIA. I just hope you can use guns fine.

Fera: Yep!

KoD: I have a scythe, And lightning.

Retro: And I got a barrel full o' magic pixels!

Lando: ...Right.

Watcher guard: A missile is headed for us!

Lando: What!? Shoot it down, quickly!

Watcher: But our anti-missile firing team isn't ready yet...

Retro: I'll take care of it.

Lando: Are you insane? You can't stop a missile!

Retro: Duh, pixels!

Lando: We're all doomed...

~Retro runs out of the tent and holds his hand in front of him and generates a large armor of pixels around his body, then flies into the air. Using a large blast of pixels, he vaporizes the missile, and then descends back down.~

Lando: How...how did you do that?

Retro: I just said! PIXELS.

Lando: Well, use em' some more, cause their army is coming!

KoD: Ooh, finally, non-scheduled reaping! *Runs out of the tent*

Fera: Where's the nearest gun?! *Lightning bolt strikes Fera, and she emerges with a huge bazooka in each arm, then follows everyone outside.*

Lando: I must be dreaming...

~A group of guards lay down in tall grass and inch their way forward to the edge of a somewhat tall cliff. They look with binoculars and see hundreds of tanks and soldiers heading straight for the CIA encampment. One radios Lando and he sends out his army as well, but with the uneven amount on their side, they take cover in nearby forests and cliff sides.

Retro, KoD, and Fera join a squad of soldiers with Lando, who conceal themselves in a nearby cave and wait for the opening attack. Lando lays out a map on the floor and marks the spots were his troops are, and where the Legion troops are.~

Lando: We'll need you guys to help out on the front lines. Do you think you can do it with those powers of yours?

KoD: Piece of cake!

Fera: Lemme at em'!!!

Retro: Well I was thinking that- *Explosion rocks from outside the cave. The first shot has been fired.* -erm, never mind.

Lando: *Runs outside the cave* Return fire!

~As the sun slowly rises and sheds light onto the mountains, roaring gunfire comes from both sides. The battle has officially begun.

Meanwhile, Cosbine sits in his helicopter and watches the fight.~

Cosbine: Hyuck...*snort* I love watching those guys squirm with their defensive tactics. What happened to that missile we launched?

Winslow: Shot down, sah. By an unknown weapon.

Cosbine: Unknown? Fool! They have no chance to beat me with weapons they have no way of having! Leave no one alive! Storm the villages! Get me more JUICE!

Winslow: Very good, sah.

KoD: So, guys, I never really asked about this. I know Legion is evil, but I used to be a part of the CIA.

Retro: You WHAT?! *holds hand to KoD's face with pixels*

KoD: Gah! Wait! *holds stubs up in a surrendering manner* What's wrong with the CIA? I know they don't fight for justice, but they help orphans and kittens, don't they?

Retro: ...What? Where the hell did you get that idea?

KoD: This pamphlet! *holds it up*

Retro: Huh... No, they take over pieces of the universe of heavens and sell them. They're pirates.

KoD: Pirates? Holy crap.

Retro: How'd you not know? You said "You fool!" along with Fera.

KoD: I dunno, it felt right. Anyway, damn... I woulda never joined CIA if I knew that. Curse you, pamphlet and your deception! *tucks it away neatly in his hood*

Retro: Oh, I thought you were gonna crumple it or something.

KoD: Nope, memento.

Fera: Hey, you guys, maybe we should be helping out these CIA guys.

Retro: Oh, right right.

KoD: Yeah, sorry. Well, to make up for it I'll actually use some crash.

Retro: What the hell's crash?

KoD: That's why I'm doing this >.> Here, hold these. *takes off his hood and hands it and his scythe to Retro*

The three of them exit the cave and join the other troops. KoD climbs on top of the missile of an RPG.

KoD: Hey, aim me at a tank.

Soldier: What? Are you serious?

KoD: C'mon now.

The soldier takes aim and fires at a tank and KoD takes off with it. KoD squints his eyes until the RPG almost hits and leaps off of it. Before coming back down, he charges up some crash into his fist and slams it down onto a tank, disabling it. He leaps off of that one and shoots some crash blasts at other tanks, exploding them like crazy. The Legion troops were stunned by seeing this little orange thing take out a bunch of tanks, but finally snap out of it and fire at him. He scurries around the ground serpentining until he comes upon his first enemy victim and leaps onto his face with a crash-charged fist. He grips the soldier's face while his screams are muffled by the charged stub and KoD runs into more troops, using the soldier's head as a battering ram to all of them. The gripped soldier's head has become engulfed in golden flame, so all the other soldiers catch fire as well and run around flailing their arms in a humorous manner. Eventually, KoD's luck runs out and a very, very large group of Legion troops point their guns at him. He drops the burnt-skull soldier and runs for it with his stubs in the air and feet fluttering as he manages to elude the enemy soldiers behind the tanks, both destroyed and not and go back to the CIA camp unnoticed. KoD collapses after getting back to Retro and Fera and pants face-down on the ground.

Retro: That was kinda cool.

KoD: Mmphnks.

~Back to the Rocky/Kane skirmish~

El Mundo: Senor Rocky! Your fighting style is great! I look forward to the day we may fight in the ring!

Kane: Keep lookin'

~Kane appears behind El Mundo, snaps his right arm, plants a bomb on his back, and sends the masked wrestler into another area of the station, all using Kane's right hand. A loud rumble is heard throughout the floating base, fallow by smoke drifting through the hole El Mundo's body put through a wall. Kane simply looks up at the cieling in a crazed stare, and slowly places his sights on GORE~

GORE: Sorry kid, my contract don't say nothin' b'out fightin' no freaks ah' nature!

~GORE scurries off through a dark hallway. Kane then dissapears from sight. Rocky and Fred nervously eye the area for Kane until a sickening whail of pain is heard from the direction GORE retreated to. A bloody-handed Kane then reappears next to Fred who's back starightens right up and face turns white as a ghost~

Kane: Y'know what they say dont'cha? ~Light's cigar and blows smoke in Fred's face~ Third time's the charm

~Kane pulls a hidden dagger from the sleave of his coat and thrusts it towards Fred's throat but something blocks it. It's Rocky's arm! Rocky stands firmly infront of Fred, the blade of the dagger cuts deep into Rocky's forearm, blood runs down his leather jacket sleave and some fast rock music starts playing.~

Rocky: I believe this fight is between you and me

Fred: Yeah!

Rocky: Quiet!

Kane: Very well, if you rather die now then so be it.

Rocky: Believe me, I have no plans on dying here, buddy

Kane: Well I have news for you brother

Rocky: What's that?

Kane: You're already dead!

~Kane slugs Rocky in the face, knocking his sunglasses off, Kane then continues to twist Rocky's arm out of place, unsheath a second scythe and impales it in Rocky's stomach, Kane then does a roundhouse kick sending the blade fully through Rocky's spine. Rocky's eyes grow enourmous with surprise, he gasps for breath and slumps down to his kness while clawing at the very satisfied looking Kane's chest~

Rocky: You......How.......But I'm.....

Kane: Done for!

~Rocky looks up at Kane who proceeds to kick the dying boy in the face which sends him into a wall. Kane puts his cigar out on his palm and begins to walk away before a hand clamps onto his shoulder, Kane tunrs around to see a dazed looking Fred~

Fred: That wasn't supossed to happen. You broke the rules.

~Several more Freds appear out of nowhere~

Fred 2: And now you will face the consequences

Fred 5: There's no escape

Fred 7: We're gonna kick your ass

All Freds: CARNIVAL STYLE!

--------

OoC: OH SNAP ROCKY DIED! Or did he? You'll have to wait and see in my next post! Nobody else write about what's happening in that room with Rocky, Kane and Fred until then

~The battle at Mt. Widget rages on, with heavy gunfire coming from both sides. Several tanks, by Cosbine's command, shoot their rounds all at once to either side of the mountain protecting the CIA troops, causing huge rocks and rubble to collapse on top of them. Lando grabs a soldier who is still blindly firing forward, not noticing the huge boulder about to crush him, and jumps out of the way in the nick of time. Cosbine, meanwhile, arms himself with a sniper rifle and attempts to pick off a few soldiers, but, luckily, can't aim to save his life.~

Cosbine: Winslow! How many did I get so far?

Winslow: Ah, um, yes, zero, sah.

Cosbine: Whaddyu say?! *Holds up rifle point blank in front of his butler*

Winslow: Ahem, yes. I mean two, ah, million, sah.

Cosbine: That's a new record!! Right!?

Winslow: You always beat me, sah. *Launches a bazooka round from his position, sending him flying back, but nailing a group of a dozen CIA troops with one shot*

Cosbine: Bah, I grow bored of spanking you at killing! Is the new weapon ready? The one that shoots exploding ORPHANS!?

Winslow: Preparations were just finished, sah. Ready to fire on your command.

Cosbine: We'll wipe out their smarmy leader with a depressed kid from two towns over! HAHAHA!!

~Meanwhile, Lando observes the battlefield from a ridge with binoculars.~

Lando: I think their leader's helicopter is up there. *Lowers binoculars* Think you can take him out, Retro?

Retro: Of course I can!

Fera: Okay, just be careful sweeti- HEY, YEAH, I GOT ONE! *Fire two more rounds out of her rocket launchers* TAKE THAT!! YEAH!! BLOOD! GUTS! DESTRUCTION!! -Oh and wear a coat so you don't catch a cold, alright?

Retro: Piece of cake. All I gotta do is blast him from a safe distance with my pixel power, and the rest of the army should fall automatically. It always works in the movies.

~Retro takes off, leaving a big cloud of dust behind him. Flying through the air, he can see the CIA forces slowly beginning to fall back. There isn't much time, he thought, and if I don't help them defeat this guy, then Widget is doomed. DOOMED!

Retro rockets towards the helicopter, and begins to charge his energy, but he notices a man in a tuxedo with an eye patch aiming a bazooka at him after spotting him. He launches a round, which flies towards him. Retro simply blasts it and continues flying towards the helicopter. Suddenly the whole copter plummets to the ground. Retro follows it downward as it spirals, black smoke coming out of the tail.~

Cosbine: Idiot! IDIOT! Why did you smash the controls!?

Winslow: To save us, sah. Let me handle this.

~Retro follows the helicopter closely, but cautiously, not sure whether to blow it up, or save it. The man who fired a round at him yells from somewhere in the copter at him.~

Winslow: Sah, I don't mean to be rude, but we seem to have encountered engine failure! This is rather unfortunate for the Widget hostages we have, no?

Retro: What'd you say!? *Retro flies right for the helicopter, and underneath it, stopping it the best that he could. As it carefully levels out and drops slowly to the ground, Retro lets go, and rushes around to the helicopter door, where he is greeted with a bazooka round to the FACE.*

Winslow: *Lowering gun* Hm, I thought you were smarter than that. *Suddenly goes wide eyed when Retro gets up, despite the explosion*

Retro: *Brushes himself off* You got some nerve, buddy. I'm not really that fond of butlers, but I'll give you a choice. Leave now, so I can take out your commanding officer, or die along with him when I blast both of you in the next minute or so.

Winslow: I'm afraid in war there's always another option, and it's always to fight. *Brandishes a knife* And I always get my man.

~Winslow lowers his knife to the side, and uses his free hand to remove his eye patch. Retro winces, but looks to see a mechanical device of some sort where he socket was. Winslow presses a small button with his hand and then lowers his eyepatch.~

Winslow: It's a secret technique I've developed. I'm quite partial to science and magic, you know.

Retro: That's fascinating.

~Retro blinks, and suddenly another image of Winslow is standing beside the one who was originally there. He blinks once more in disbelief, and finds a third standing to the other side of the original when he opens his eyes again.~

Winslow: I think you see them now. Me, I mean. It's a nice little technique. You see, when I activated that button I actually shot a little receptor into your eyes, connecting to your brain. Every time you blink, you'll see another one of me. 100% of my opponents before you have gone mad by the time they were finished fighting me, let's see how you do, hm?

~The three Winslows jump forward and then dodge out of the way of Retro's pixel blast. One of the images appears next to him and throws a small clot of sand in Retros' eyes. Retro puts his hands to his face and tries to get the sand out as best he can, but blinks several times without realizing, and when he finally regains his vision, at least seven Winslows are standing before him, all holding knives. Retro backs away, slightly, but then unleashes another blast of pixels, at all of the images. It goes right through some, and the others quickly dodge.~

Retro: (He's too fast for my blasts. I wonder if I should just fly around and see which one I can hit?)

~Retro lowers his arm and rockets forward, punching Winslow after Winslow, his punches seemingly going through them all, but at he passes them, he's hit, somehow, with a knife slash. He falls and rolls to the ground, then looks over his shoulder at the others. There's suddenly a couple more of them. Retro does his best to keep from blinking, but he can't help it when he does.~

Winslow: This is nothing, sah. The most clones, I believe, that one of my victims saw before his death was five thousand and nine. He was a persistent fellow, almost managed to strike me, too. I do hope you'll be the next high score. But let's see how you fair against this first, shall we?

~The Winslows all throw their knives to the dirt, and unstrap the grenade launcher from their backs. Retro is about to fly away, but a couple of Winslows jump onto his back, or so he thinks, and bring him to the ground. He unleashes a furious wave of energy around him, knocking many of them down, but there just seem to be more and more coming. There must be at least twenty of them now, he thinks.

The Winslow who climbed atop a rock fired one of his grenade rounds the second he ended his attack, and knocked Retro to the ground again. The others, suddenly, do the same at once. Retro shields himself, but still can't help from closing his eyes again and again. He opens, and a new set of Winslows take off their grenade launchers and fire them, and the process repeats.~

Retro: (I'm trying to knock them all down at once, but it's not working! And every time I go to make a move, I make more images of himself and they keep knocking me down with their constant barrages of grenades. What do I do? All I can see are explosions!)

Winslow: You're almost up to three hundred, sah!

~Almost a second later, the firing stops. Retro looks upwards to see all of the Winslows looking at Cosbine, who just came out of the helicopter, apparently. He stood next to one Winslow and put his hand on his butlers' shoulder.~

Cosbine: Winslow, I think the helicopter crashed. Get me a pillow, I feel sleepy.

Winslow: Sah, you musn't interfere with my battles. *Suddenly is caught in a huge blast and flies straight backwards into a rock wall, yelling out as he's pressed farther back into it by pure pixel energy.*

Retro: God, I hate magic tricks. *Intensifies his blast, and shatters the rock, and also reduces Winslow to dust.*

Cosbine: You…you fried the butler.

Retro: I gave him the choice to surrender, he knew what could happen.

Cosbine: You fried my butler.

Retro: But now I’m gonna stop this war on Partur!

Cosbine: My butler…you fried him.

Retro: And your evil tyranny on this planet as well.

Cosbine: He belonged to ME. Nobody breaks my stuff!

~Cosbine runs slowly at Retro and throws a very weak punch, which is easily deflected by Retro, who sends him spinning while flying into a rock formation. Cosbine immediately jumps up and starts yelling.~

Cosbine: Cheater! Fight me man to man!

Retro: …Fine. *Removes Pixel exoskeleton* There, but I can still beat you down easily.

Cosbine: *Snort* I can’t believe Winslow lost to you! *Hops down from his crater in the side of the rock and runs up to Retro* But Cosbine always wins!

~Cosbine throws another weak punch, which isn’t deflected by Retro but dodged, and just as easily too. Retro lets himself fall to the ground and does a break-dancing kick, knocking Cosbine on his rear. Retro then jumps back upwards and kicks him square in the face, sending him rolling backwards into another rock formation.~

Cosbine: Ugh…you’re lucky I’m sore from all of my weight training or else I’d mop the FLOOR with you!

~Cosbine laughs a little but yelps and ducks as Retro’s pixel fist smashes into the rock where his head used to be. Cosbine crawls away quickly and jumps behind another rock, shouting from behind it.~

Cosbine: Y’know, you shouldn’t be wasting your time with me when my men have more than likely captured all of your friends by now!

~Meanwhile, at the battlefield, you see Fera and KoD back to back on a huge pile of Legion corpses, with more falling from the sky somehow. They do a high five and continue slaughtering soldiers while they helplessly run away.~

Retro: Nah, I got faith in them.

Cosbine: Not for long… hyuck hyuck. *Snorts, then suddenly cowers when the rock behind him crumbles, with Retro’s fist in the middle of where it used to be.~

Retro: This war has to end now! *Raises up hand over Cosbine*

Cosbine: *Throws arms to the air and then bows to the ground* HAVE MERCY! I SURENDER! UNCLE! AUNT! COUSIN! WHOEVER IT IS, JUST PLEASE DON’T HURT MEEEEE!

Retro: *Sigh* …I’m amazed people like you lead armies.

Cosbine: *Rolls to the side and shuffles over to a boulder, then climbs atop of it with some trouble* Huff….huff…you ain’t gonna get me, Gundam lad- I have all five aces in a card deck up my sleeves! You cannot win!

Retro: Right. *Transforms into pixel suit* Give me about a second and we’ll see.

Cosbine: Eep! *Jumps down and pulls out a transceiver* Alright…I was saving this for BLANDO, but this guy is clearly much more of a threat! *Snorts with laughter but then yelps as the crashing sound of a boulder is heard behind him, so he then runs faster*

~Meanwhile, above the sky, a somewhat large air carrier of some sort looms over the battlefield…~

Co-Pilot: Dur, which button relishes the boom-dickey?

Pilot: *Sips tea* The only button I installed on your panel, chum.

Co-Pilot: Dur course!

Pilot: But we’re waiting for Sir King Cosbine’s order first, and the coordinates.

Cosbine: *Through transceiver* Change in plans! We’re releasing the weapon on THAT guy!! *Sound of him avoiding a blast is heard* DO IT QUICKLY TOO! Coordinates are…

Pilot: *Puts information in the computer* Okay, release the bomb.

Co-Pilot: Durkay. *Presses button with his face, releasing the bomb*

~Retro looks skyward, suddenly noticing a huge crate object coming straight for him. He blasts part of it with his pixel beams, and it changes it’s landing position slightly, but lands still. Cosbine cackles from some unknown location and curses out Retro’s name too. Retro is suddenly grabbed by a huge claw that sends him flying into the air. While airborne, he looks down to see a giant steel abomination with a larger than life turret pointing at him. It fires a round, which resembles a spinning body.~

Cosbine: Pump him out the wazoo with orphans! Do it!!

~The cannon on the top of the weapon opens, and a barrage of orphans fly outwards at Retro, who dodges as they fly past him, but as they come down they suddenly expand and explode.~

Cosbine: Gwah haha haha! What a great idea, the Orphank Mach 5! It’s mach 5 because it’s better than mach 4, which is for weaklings!

~Retro launches downward, but floats right before hitting the ground. Through another rock a second claw comes through, narrowly missing him as he dodged, but doubles back and nails him on his side as it retracts. He grabs it as it flies back towards the machine, and punches it hard on one side of it, causing it to flinch. The Orphank grinds its wheels in the dirt and turns, holding one arm out, and swatting Retro away, probably back to the old battlefield to make some kind of sense.~

Cosdbine: HAHAHA! Okay, time to get serious. *Inhales for a long moment, holding both hands to his temples, then exhales* Okay…*snort* Let’s go visit Lando, I want to show him my toy.

Kane: Nyuuugh!

~Kane covers his face with his forarms as Fred unlashes several raid kicks over and over. Kane grabs Fred's foot but before he can react, another Fred wrestles him to the ground. Kane rolls ontop of Fred and crushes his face in, grabs his head and swings him at some other Freds than knock down like bowling pins. Kane goes to fallow up his attack when he is jumpe by two Freds who hold his arms while a third Fred continues to pulverise Kane's gut. Kane knees between the legs of the Fred infront of him. While Fred doubles over in pain, Kane swiftly snaps Fred's neck with his feet, then Kane backflips behind the two Freds, grabs their skulls and smashes them together. Blood splatters on Kane who seems to be taking a twisted pleasure of killing all these Freds. A Fred then grabs the back of Kane's skull and thrusts him backwards. Kane's body rolls like a tire down the metal floor until a Fred holds his foot out which Kane's face collides with. Then several Freds dogpile Kane, punching whatever they can hit. A light flashes underneath all the Fred's and quickly goes out. Suddenly Kane bursts trough all the Freds who fly in several directions, some collide with the wall and make huge dents, some get launched into different rooms, and one's face makes contact with a ceiling light which sends several volts of electricity throuh his body in a show of sparks and light. Kane bends over and releases a dark energy wave which kills several other Freds and creates a dark flame around Kane's body. Kane then spots the last Fred who attempts to flee, Kane appears infront of Fred who collids with his large opponent and falls on the floor. Kane then holds a blade to Fred's throat~

Kane: Game over, pal

~A hand then taps Kane on the shoulder. Kane, surprised, slowly turns around to face Rocky with a knife still jutting from his stomach~

Rocky: Yo wassup?

~Kane's mouth drops and he unknowingly releases his blade. Fred scrambles away~

Rocky: You knows..... ~Grasps the hilt of the knife protruding from his stomach, he then removes the blade, his wound heals up almost instanty~ You should'nt play with knives

~Rocky throws the knife at Kane's head who is too busy trying to protect himself from the blade to notice that Rocky is winding up a kick. Rocky kicks Kane in the side of the head who flies directly towards a wall, Rocky then appears behind Kane and continues to trample on Kane's face, stomach, and private region before he slams into a wall. Rocky's attack doesn't stop there, he grabs Kane's face, pulls him over Rocky and then rockets Kane into the ceiling with a hard kick. Rocky then grabs shards of glass from the broken ceiling light and flings them at Kane, some shards are as big as dinner plate. Some shards only cut Kane, some impale themselves into his knees, arms, chest and face. Rocky then holds his hands together in a gun shape an blasts a small energy beam into Kane's stomach which gets gradually larger, and larger. Rocky stops his attacking when the debris and smoke make it hard to see Kane's crippled body imbedded in the ceiling~

~Now for a change of scenery. The setting is in the city of New York, namely a high class italian resturant called "Mario's". What you would expect is raging fires and ADAM zombies, but in fact, there are none, there are only people, normal looking people going about their normal lives, as if nothing has happened, but with this all too ordinary scene is a terrible truth. All he customers sit at their tables, motionless and emotionless. Thereare no waiters to tak their orders, no chefs cooking up meals. The only sound heardis from a group playing the all too familiar Godfather theme. In the center of a resturant is a very long table reserved or very important people, sitting around the table are severa shady looking men, all wearing suits and a handgun in each pocket, some wear hats, some smoke cigars, they all sem to be thinking sinister thoughts. On one end of the table are the captured, and injured, Killface, Barnaby Jones, and Doc Hatchet, they're tied up to chairs with more men behind tem pointing their weapon at their heads. On the other side of the table there sits a large man, he wears a black, pinstriped suit with a large, red rose in the left pocket. The man holds a large whine glass in his right hand, he's smoking a very expensive cigar and sports a black fedora and a Desert Eagle concealed behind his left pocket.~

Man: So, you come to my city, my town, my turf as it were. And you try and stop what I'm doing for the people of MY city. Now I ask you, why? Why am I some thing to be stopped? What is wrong with what I do, I ask you.

Doc: Well I-

Man: Take a look around, do you see these people? Do you see what I've done for them? Do you see how content they are? No worries, no sarrow, no anger, no jelousy. Tese people are happy with their lives, they're happy with the way things are, they're happy with ME! And you wanna ruin it all is that it?

Doc: Well we-

Man: You see, Mr. Hatchet, I'm a man of business, and you blowin that gizmo ya' got out there ain't good fer business. Now yer gonna find a way to fix it or we're gonna have a little problem on our hands and I think you've gotten enough trouble fer one day, don't you?

Doc: Why do you wanna go back to Earth anyway? Havn't you heard? It was gonna blow u-

~The man stands up from his chair which causes some whine glasses to fall over~

Man: That's a load of crock and you know it! The Earth ain't gonna go out anytime soon! t's just "recycling", it does it every couple of centuries or so, things get bad then get good, that's how it works. If it were gonna blow it would've done it a long time ago. Rapture ain't got nothin' to do wit' it, kid.

Barnaby: Rapture? Kid? the only guy I've heard about from Rapture that uses that word like that was that Fred Fanta guy, but he's dead.....

Man: The name's Fontane, kid, and I ain't never gonna die!

Doc: So........It's really you......not any of those imposters running around the city?

Fontane: No, kid. I rounded up those scumbags and lets say they better know how to swim

Mobster: Serves them right fer tryin' to trash your reputation, boss

Fontane: Indeed

Doc: So it really is you.......Oh Frank.........You never learn do you?

Killface: You know this brute?

Doc: Let's just say we go way back

Fontane: Yes, way back. Y'know I still got that bullet you gave me ~Fontane reaches into his shirt pocket and pulls out a very large, golden bullet with blood stains all over it~ Yeah, I still remember that day, right behind the left ear wadn't it? ~Fontane lifts his fedora to show a small hole behind his ear~

Doc: Nice shot, huh?

Fontane: Yeah, very nice......How's your leg been doin?

Doc: It's been better.

Fontane: Heh heh.......~Adam quickly flows onto Fontane's hand and form's a revolver which Fontane loads the bullet into and aims at Doc's head~ Hope dis hurts!

~Fontane lowers his revolver and fires the bullet right into Doc Hatchet's kneecap. Doc falls over and starts squirming in incredible pain~

Fontane: You should'nt have come back, Doc. You might've won the first time but the only thing you can do now is lose! ~Fontane delivers a kick to Doc's chest which knocks the wind out of him~ Now YOU two turn this rock back to Earth or you're gonna end up in alot more pain than dis guy!

~Killface and Barnaby nervously look down at Doc and both take a big gulp~

Fontane: Get them outta here!

~The mobsters grab Killface and Barnaby and drag them away. Another Mobster comes and tries to drag Doc with him but Fontane stops him~

Fontane: Leave em with me ~Fontane steps over to Doc, takes a sip of wine and drops hot ash on Doc's face with his cigar~ Heh heh........Game over, kid......

*back at the old battlefield where Fera and KoD are killing Legion soldiers and having fun. "Having a Wonderful Time" by Tiny Tim is playing while they both tear through soldiers with their weapons.*

Stealthy Legion Soldier: *holds up giant gatling gun from behind KoD and Fera* Ha ha! Time to get filled with bullets!

Fera and KoD: Oh no, death!

*However, Retro's flailing body crashes into the Stealthy Legion Soldier and kills the soldier on impact*

Fera and KoD: Yay, continued living!

*Retro staggers up and gives a triumphant thumbs-up*

KoD: So, what caused you to fall from the sky like that?

Retro: Cosbine's Orphank. I think he's bringing it here to use on the PDG troops.

KoD: *raises stub* Wait wait, question.

Retro: Yes?

KoD: What is a cosbine and orphank?

Retro: That thing, right there *points to the incoming Orphank backing the Legion troops*

KoD: *turns and looks at it* Hm... well, that's not good, is it?

Retro: No, which is why I'm gonna somehow destroy it without harming its orphan arsenal.

Fera: It shoots... orphans?

Retro: Apparently, yeah.

Fera: That's horrible! Go destroy that thing, sweetie, and save those orphans!

Retro: Right, I just said that.

Fera: Oh, yeah.

Retro: Anyway, attempt 2 is GO! *flies off at high speeds towards the lumbering Orphank of horribleness*

KoD: Attempt 2?

Fera: *shrug*

Retro: *thinking* Gonna kiiiill some Cosbine, oh yeah! Gonna saaaave some orphans, prob-ab-ly!

*As soon as Retro arrives near the Orphank, he doesn't stop for anything, he just flies RIGHT THROUGH it; it's neat. He was flying too fast for the Orphank to respond, so he easily went through it. He comes out the other side holding Cosbine by the throat while hovering*

Retro: Yeah, you're gonna die.

Cosbine: I don't think so.

*Retro looks at him with a puzzled look since Cosbine looks pretty screwed, but all of a sudden, one of the Orphanks crazy-ass claws comes crashing down on Retro and pins him to the ground in a prone position. Cosbine is also released in the process and just drops to the ground*

Retro: Nrgh, can't... move.

Cosbine: *chuckle snorts while pulling out a knife* Say goodbye to your non-stabbed head, gundam boy.

*Cosbine raises his knife and is about to stab Retro's head... but wait! what's this?!*

KoD: *while leaping in the air towards Cosbine with his scythe* YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! *quick, clean slice to Cosbine's neck*

*KoD lands behind Cosbine's body while Cosbine's head rolls off his shoulders and the body falls to its knees and then finally onto the ground*

KoD: *turns to face Cosbine and points with his stub* There can be only ONE! Haha, yeah. *Cosbine's corpse then blows the hell up* ...Huh, neat. High five, Retro *holds up his stub to Retro* ...Oh right, you're being crushed.

*KoD severs the claw's tentacle thing with his scythe and with the pressure gone, Retro throws off the claw with ease and gets to his feet*

KoD: K, high five. *holds up stub*

Retro: ...You killed Cosbine.

KoD: Dude, I know, hence the high five, cmon.

Retro: ...You cut his head off.

KoD: *sigh* fine, no high five >.>

Retro: The war's over...

KoD: Is it? Awesome. So right, weren't you supposed to save the orphans or something.

Retro: ...Huh? Oh, yeah, orphans. *flies off and breaks into the Orphank again, making a different hole.*

*The two pilots were too horrified by Cosbine's decapitation to do anything so Retro just broke off the Orphan Storage Tank™ and exited the vehicle. However, upon exiting and getting a safe distance away, the Orphank exploded anyway.*

Retro: *lands back down next to KoD* Well, I did it, I destroyed the Orphank and saved the orphans.

KoD: You sure did.

Retro: C'mon, let's get back to Fera and the PDG.

KoD: Right, right, yeah, in a minute. There's something I gotta tell you, though. Since we're actually alone, it seems fitting.

Retro: ...KoD, I got Fera pregnant, that should be enough of a hint.

KoD: Shut up, not that >.> This is hard to tell you, so... alright, here goes... I am your father.

Retro: ...*faint*

KoD: Hm ._.

*Retro was stirred from his sleep by the prodding of something blunt against his side*

KoD: Heeeey, Retro, get up. *prodding him with the staff end of his scythe*

Retro: *still dazed* So... you're... no, you can't be. You can't be my father.

KoD: Says who? ._. Don't talk back to me >.>

Retro: My parents died when I was born!

KoD: Well, your mom died, yeah. Whatever guy she was with wasn't your dad, though.

Retro: *grabbing KoD by his... hm... he just grabbed him and started squeezing* You shut up! My dad died along with my mom!

KoD: *struggling to breathe* Will you hear me out? o.o

Retro: *lets go* Teh, fine, go ahead and feed me more lies, you little spongey bastard.

KoD: What'd I say about talking back? ._. Anyway, listen. This isn't my first time at this planet. The last time I was here was when... well, when I met your mother.

Retro: Impossible! You're way to young to have done that!

KoD: You don't know how old I am >.> Anyway, suffice it to say, she was hot. Like... whoa. *Retro goes to choke him again, but KoD dodges to the side* Wait wait, sorry, that meant to be endearing. Alright, no more talk of your mom's hotness. So yeah, she thought I was fairly attractive, too. I mean... she must've since we... *Retro glares at him* So anyway, once she found out she was pregnant with you, she decided that it was best if I just left. I was pretty hurt by that, I mean... geez, harsh, right? >.> However, she explained to me that when you were born, it'd be pretty weird to explain that your dad was a... little marshmallow man. So, of course, I complied. I didn't want any kids to be making fun of your half marshmallow-ness. So, I left. I can only assume she found someone else from the town to be your father, but... unfortunately, he died with your mom like you said.

Retro: So... you're really my dad?

KoD: Uh huh, Orter's, too, I guess. Can't believe she had twins.

Retro: I'm still having trouble buying this whole thing. How do I know you're really my dad?

KoD: I actually have the perfect test for that. See that rock right there? *points to a rock*

Retro: ...Yeah, what about it?

KoD: Inhale it.

Retro: What?

KoD: In-hale it. Just start inhaling and pretty soon that vacuum breath will kick in.

Retro: ...Whatever, fine. *starts inhaling and nothing happens at first, but then the inhaling starts to get stronger and stronger to Retro's disbelief. Soon, the rock is in his mouth and he swallows it. When he does, he doesn't look any different, except he has a weird hat on and his skin turned significantly grayer. He looks down and sees this* ...What the hell is this?!

KoD: That's the Rock ability. You can turn to stone, isn't that neat?!

Retro: No, this is just messed up! How do I get rid of this?!

KoD: Spit out the rock.

Retro: *somehow spits out the rock and turns to normal. He looks down at his hands and sees they're back to his normal skin tone*

KoD: See? Totally my son.

Retro: I... I guess so. ...Can you do that?

KoD: Sorta. I can use the Vacuum Breath, but I can't use the Copy ability since it was replaced by permanent Crash, which you would know if you READ MY BACKSTORY! *stub pointing at Retro* Anyway, let's get going, we'll probably get medals.

Retro: ...Alright, yeah, let's go... Dad.

KoD: *smiles* ...Oh, by the way, Fera's your sister. Yeah.

Retro: O.O *deep inhale, but no vacuum breath, and throws his hands to the sky* NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

*Retro sits straight up and then looks to his side to see KoD prodding him with his scythe*

KoD: Finally! I've been poking you forever.

Retro: *holds his head* So... wait, was that a dream?

KoD: I dunno, maybe, you were knocked out.

Retro: Are... are you really my father?

KoD: What? No! ._. I was KIDDING. Son of a bitch, lighten up. Let's go, Mr. TakeEverythingSeriouston *starts to walk towards the camp*

Retro: Yeah... the war's over, finally. *gets up and walks next to KoD, carrying the Orphan Storage Tank™* So... does that mean Fera's not my sister, then?

KoD: What do you think? >.>

~~OoC: And now an important announcment from Me. I heart all of you, and welcome me back to the OGing world!

?~~~

Fontane: Tell me, Kid, how's your employer doing?

*Fontane shoots doc hatchet in the shoulder*

Doc: Who, Clyde... hack..... the bastard set me up. *coughs up blood*

Fontane: Bullshit!

*Fontane turns the revolver into a knife, and slits his own cheeck, letting blood spill onto doc hatchet.*

Fontane: Does it sting, do you feel the memory of pain?

~-~~FLASHBACK~~

Fontane: I knew you would come. Did Clyde send you?

*Doc hatchet says nothing, and pulls out his pistol, loaded with golden bullets*

Fontane: You can't kill me kid, you dont have the balls.

*Fontane sips his wine, and Doc Hatchet attempts to fire, but before he can, Clyde walks in with the same gun, and shoots fontane in the skull. He topples over, and soaks in a pool of his own blood*

Doc Hatchet: What are you doing here?!

Clyde: You murdered Fontane?

Doc: What?!

Clyde: I see the gun in your hand.

*Clyde shoots Doc hatchet in the leg*

~~~~

Doc Hatchet: AHHHHARh

Fontane: Feel my pain. Ahahahehah.

*Fontane picks up Doc Hatchet, and drags him out of the restaraunt.*

Fontane: Because of you, clyde is going to destroy everything.

Doc Hatchet: HE SET ME UP-

*Fontane slams his hand into Doc Hatchets neck, knocking him out. He walks by many mannequins, talking to each one as if they were humans*

Fontane: Hey there Zack, how'd the ballgame go?

*The mannequin topples over*

Fontane: Zack.... you don't look so good, kid.

~~~

*Doc Hatchet wakes up inside a crate attatched to a rope, suspended above the ocean. Fontane is standing at the rope, with a knife ready to cut it down.*

Fontane: So then, I hear you're awake in their. Where's clyde.

Doc: I DON'T KNOW!

Fontane: Tick tock

Doc: I seriously don't know, Fontane, please don't kill me like this.

Fontane: Tick


tock


Tick


tock

Doc: OK OK, uhhh.... uhhhh he's in uhhh.... space.

Fontane: Lies don't cut it kid.

Doc: Look, I have no idea where Clyde is, but I know someone who does.

Fontane: Who.

*Killface and barnaby Jones are dragged in boxes and histed above the ocean as well.*

Fontane: WHO.

Doc: There was a hooded man, he could know where Clyde is.

Fontane: You are coming with me, Mr. Hatchet. HAhahaa

Rocky: GHUUUGHHHNNN!

~Rocky is thrown across the room, he hovers a coupl inches above the ground. Kane appears above Rocky with a sick grin, grabs Rocky's face and buries his head in the ground as they move. Kane begins to unload on Rocky's body with hundreds of furious punches, Rocky is helpless to do anything. Kane then slams his boot down onto Rocky's face, then begins to impale Rocky with a long knife but Fred tackles Kane who drops the knife next to Rocky. Kane grabs Fred's head, thrusts it into his knee then roundhouse kicks the dizzy man into a wall~

Kane: You should be outta my way for awhi~Kane tilts his head as Rocky throws a blazing fist by his face. Kane proceeds to kick Rocky in the chest, grab his arm, and thrust him into Fred who justegan to exit the wall~

Kane: Don't you ever give up?

???: No... He doesn't. Whatever is thrown at him, he bounces right back. It's in his genes. It was how he was made

Kane scanning the room: Who's there?!

???: Come now, don't you recognise me X-64?

Kane: What'd you call me!

???: X-64, that is your name isn't it brother?

~A grinning X-66 steps into the room, he's completelly unscathed despite that chandelier falling on him~

Kane: Brother? Impossible! I have no brothers! Or atleast I won't when I get rid of this kid! ~points to Rocky~

X-66: Don't be so rash brother, You do know about the Rapture Genetic Cloning Project don't you?

Kane: I know more about it than anyone else should! There were 65 of us back then....

X-66: That's what Clyde told you, wasn't it?

Kane: Ye-

X-66: Did he also tell you about father? They said he was the greatest soldier/assassin in the world you know. He could kill a man with a candy wrapper. And we......We have his genes inside of us. We're destined killers, you, me, the boy. We'll always be killing, and we love every moment of it. And that's all we'll ever do, tampering withthe genetic code has been done so that we've been left unable to fertalize! What kind of sick joke.......Beings are put in this universe to reproduce, that's all they'll ever be good for. But we're different, we can't make life, we only take it. We take as many lives as we can and then we die, that's all. Did he tell you about that?

Kane: Well...

X-66: My life was not my own since the minute I was created.......I am the living shadow of the Rapture Genetic Cloning Project! Once X-65 came out into the world, the project was scrapped, they finally created an exact genetic copy of that man, our father! And what happened to me? I was thrown away, like garbage! You have no idea what if feels like to be knownas trash, human trash!

Kane: Cry me a river! I don't care if Clyde didn't mention X-66, 67, 68 or however high the list goes! I'm going to kill them all because I AM THE SUPERIOR!

X-66: You're trash too, you're just the composite of everything left over to make X-65, YOU'RE the inferior model and you always will be! It's your destiny, except it!

Kane: I MAKE MY OWN DESTINY!

~Kane, wielding dual knives, rushes X-66 who guards with steel gloves with tallons. X-66 falls back and thrusts Kane over him with a kick and slashes a large gash on Kane's cheeck~

Kane holding his face in utter pain: Auuugh!! It burns!!!

X-66: Yes, venom tipped claws will do that too you, now stop acting like a child

~Kane stops squirming and lets his hands down to show the scar has dissapeared~

X-66: Now, have at you!

~Over by Rocky and Fred~

Fred: Who are those guys?!

Rocky: They're my.......Brothers....

Fred: And they're trying to kill you?

Rocky: I think they're trying to kill eachother too

Fred: Boy, talk about sibling rivalry! *pa-dum-psch!*


---------




~Now we bring you to a secluded room somewhere near New York dam. Hatchet is suspended by his arms in the middle of the room, Barnaby and Killface sit uncontious in the corner and Fontane stands smoking a cigar infront of Hatchet. He leans in an puffs a large ring of smoke in Hatchet's face which wakes him and causes him to cough spontaniously~

Fontane: What's wrong kid? Don't like to smoke?

Hatchet: ~cough~ What do you want from me Frank?

Fontane: To suffa, suffa like you never have before. Yer gonna pay kid. You ain't never gonna get outta here alive and yer gonna regret messin wit Frank Fontane.

Hatchet: ~cough~ Mind me askin how are you gonna make me regret anyway?

~Fontane points to two car jumpers attached to Hatchet's chest, they run down to a large car battery next to Fontane~

Hatchet: Oh.....

Fontane: Yeah, oh

~Fontane proceeds to turn a dial on the battery which sends ALOT of electricity through Hatchet's body. Small parts of Hatchet's clothes begin to spark and catch fire as he yells in agony and his body flails like a fish out of water~

Barnaby: Hey man you just let me out of these ropes and I'll show you what real pain is!

~Fontane turns the dial which sends more electricity through Hatchet's body~

Barnaby: Yo numbskull you hear what I said?!

~Fontane leaves the battery on for a couple more seconds then turns it off. Hatchet's body stops flailing and he falls silent as smoke begins to come from his body. Fontane gets up to check Hatchet's eyes~

Fontane: Hmph.......Still alive, huh?

Barnaby: He better be!

~Fontane grabs the revolver, sticks some bullets in the chamber and spins it~

Fontane: Y'know, I've had enough of yer talk

~Hatchet is dizzy and can barely focus when he sees Fontane hold up the gun and begin to walk over to Barnaby. Fontane begins to pull the trigger when Hatchet kicks Fontane's hand which causes the gun to go off, the stray bullet happens to hit Hatchet's right eye and blood begins to spill on the ground as he whails in pain.~

Fontane: Damnit! Scuffed my cufflinks! Those things are real expensive y'know! ~Fontane punches Hatchet in the face which knocks him out~


-------------


~Now back to Legion. A gargantuant space fortress with the codename S.P.E.A.R. ( Self Propelled Exile Anhilation Revenginator) has been constructed around the floating temple and a world conquering space fleet is stationed around it. There's an unfinished area of the Fortess where a large, moon sized structure is being built. Clyde along with several of his generals and bodyguards sit around a large table in a secret war room inside the S.P.E.A.R.~

General Vilsken: As you can see here ~points to a photo of a broken down ship in a dusty plain~ The DarkStar Pirates' battleship has been damaged in the crash, their communication equipment is out of order and their hull has been destroyed. No doubt Drake and his group have gone here ~Points to a town labelled Widget~ to stock up on supplies

Clyde: Supplies, General? You're saying that small town has the resources to repair a ship as damaged as that?

???: Of course they do

~A pale skinned man with dark circles under his eyes enters from the back of the room. He has light blue hair and wearing a white jacket with fur trim, white shoes, and white pants. Cold vapor exits from his mouth and nose~

Clyde: Ah, it's about time you spoke up, Admiral Frouzt.

Frouzt: Partur is known for their industrialized economy, they have a nearly endless supply of coal, iron, gold, oil, and other commodities. Hol on......Commander Kane's last transmission stated that CIA base was stationed near Partur, right?

Clyde: Indeed it did

Frouzt: It'd make sense that the citizens of Partur work with the CIA. You seem Partur is rich in minerals, but the soil is horrible for growing crops, and the desert is too extreme for most animals, so food is scarse there. The CIA probably have a contract with the tons of Partur, they give the citizens food for metals.

Clyde: Very interesting...

Frouzt: So anyway, what happened with Kane's attack

Clyde: There has been no contact with Kane since it started, at his own request. A report was recieved that stated Captain Krunch was killed though

Frouzt: Krunch eh? Old fool that one was, corrupt to the bone

Clyde: Yes, corruption is something we simply can't allow in this orginization...

Frouzt: What did the Pirates take anyway?

Clyde: They ran off with the blueprints for the newest Metal Gear prototype, and plans on Metal Gear Mass Production

Frouzt: Sire, we can't allow the CIA to get their hands on the Metal Gear. It's too valuable

Clyde: That is why I've selected you to escort three of our newest Metal Gear types to the CIA base.....But......If Partur is as valuable as you say it is, You shall seige that plaet first and refuel there. Certainly it will hinder the CIA

Frouzt: I'm.....I'm honored sire

Clyde: Hm, so it's agreed. I can trust you to complete this mission?

Frouzt: Yes, of course sir, Legion is all I live for

~Frouzt leaves the room~

Clyde: Heh heh, all the more sweeter when you die

Kane: I should have died long before this. Do you honestly think you can kill me? You don't even have a name.

X-66: Well, I-

Kane: X-66 is NOT a name.

X-66: It's an internet handle, at least. Now, like I was saying just recently and am now re-iterating, have at you!

(X-66 does a karate FLIP towards Kane even though there are no flips in karate and Kane rushes under the claws, hoists him by the legs, and rushes him head-first into a medical cabinet, which collapses on top of the two of them. X-666 I mean 66 kicks out the back of it like the bad ass he is and stands triumphantly on top of the heavy metal container. As he turns to face Fred and Mariorocks, he realises there are two knives in the back of his neck.)

X-66: Bugger. I guess I missed those, somehow.

(While he's collapsing and dying horribly, a couple feet away...)

Rocky: Ever notice how the different authors write the characters really differently

Fred: LET'S LAUNCH OVER IT

Rocky: Okay!

GORE: Hey guys.

Rocky: Didn't you die?

GORE: Dying's for the poor.

Kane: Well, then I must be incredibly poor...

Fred: WHO DARES disturb my boring conversation!

Kane: Shut up! I'm... I'm going to destroy every last one of you, to prove my own destiny.

Mariorocks: More like CHILD'S DESTINY (ba-bum-tsch! (YEAH THAT'S REVENGE FOR THE OTHER AWFUL JOKE YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD))

GORE: I've got the perfect cure for that. It's a new product we're selling. It's called Speak-No-More! One application over the mouth and you won't be talking until you remove it, painfully!

Kane: What?

GORE: Kid how's about you and me go into buisness together you could be a great boxer

Kane: I think you already offered me that... and I doubt it's lucrative to sell anything that isn't a weapon, anymore.

GORE: Kid shutup and think about your future did your parents bring you up to drop out of college

Kane: I've had quite about enough of this DRIVEL! I'm... (Blue flames seep out from underneath his metal prison) GOING TO DESTROY YO- (Blue flames melt the ground beneath him and the heavy cabinet falls with his and X-66's corpse down through multiple stories of pain and I guess suffering)

Mariorocks: Hooray.

GORE: I guess the kid ain't got any good sense.

Fred: RIP El Mundo.

GORE: Oh yeah my cash cow. He's mooing with the fishes now.

El Mundo: Actually I'm coming back with new special powers and- (Fred and Gore throw him down the floor in the ground to his excrutiating final breaths)

GORE: (sniff) he was the lamest of us...

Fred: Wait, you think that's enough?

Mariorocks: This is so lame

GORE: Maybe we oughtta do something a bit worse

Fred: He's come back to life an awful lotta times, that Kane.

Mariorocks: Guys just let him go

(Fred and GORE push the extraordinarily heavy surgery table (that's bolted down) off of its bolts and into the melted chasm)

Fred: Phew!

GORE: Just to be safe (throws an acorn)

Fred: Listen acorns are deadly in the right and left hands but I don't think that's going to do anything

GORE: Blasphemer.

Mariorocks: Who are you guys again?

Fred: Ah, yes. YOU. I guess it's reasonable you forgot my name but this FACE should be etched in your memories FOREVER AND EVER AHAHAHAH

GORE: (pushes piano down the hole)

Mariorocks: Stop doing that!

GORE: Sorry... (throws boat anchor) nervous habit..

Fred: Yes but are you NERVOUSLY HABITUALLY NERVOUS

GORE: (backhands Fred) That's another nervous habit.

Mariorocks: Guys look at me. Look at the sword. Look at the shades. Look at the wear (daammn that's fine!). Look at my fire powers. I am the good guy, and when I'm not killing something nothing good is happening at all.

Fred: LISTEN I forget your name but LISTEN El Mundo is shracking dead thanks to this douchebag clone of yours and the only way to appropriately feel for his sacrifice is to drop very heavy things on your brother clone guy or whatever. Also it is a lot of fun.

Mariorocks: Well... Okay!

(ABOUT AN HOUR LATER)

Mariorocks: Wait, isn't this place under attack, or something?

Fred: Who cares.

Fred: Yeah no one that's who

Fred: Fred! You're alive!

Fred: No, this is just you talking multiple times in a row

Fred: Oh

GORE: Leaven's going to get you to meet up with your team again. He's realised you're most useful there, or something.

Mariorocks: Oh, awesome! I've always dreamed this day would come.

GORE: What was the planet called?

Fred: I dunno it was like Le Parkour or something

Mariorocks: That doesn't sound like a planet at all... maybe a space station...

Fred: Well whatever loser there's only one way to get there and it's without style. (grabs scalpel from the floor of the extremely empty medical room and plays it like a flute)

GORE: Watch this kid it's pretty awesome

(The Lithium Debater crashes through the ceiling and nearly lands on Fred who jumps out of the way, lands on his feet on an angle and then LAUNCHES OVER IT and into the cockpit))

Fred: YEAH MAN FUCKIN GIANT ROBOT CHECK THIS SHIT OUT I GOT HYDRAULICS

Mariorocks: Why do I have to be the serious character?

GORE: Because you're white

Mariorocks: But Fred is-

(GORE grabs Mariorocks like a barrel and they get in the trunk or maybe the CABOOSE and there is a lot of junk in it but don't make the joke or I will kill you)

Fred: LET'S LAUNCH OVER IT

(Fred steps on the gas and nothing happens so he steps on the liquid and they take off fast very fast 2 fast 2 furious for planet Parkour)

~Leaven limps through the hallways, shouting Adele's name as he goes. He can no longer hear the sounds of battle, so he assumes the assault as ended. However, he still hurries onwards, driven by some sense inside him, and eventually reaches a dead end. Adele's room, he says out loud to himself, and opens the door. Sure enough, gazing out the window into space was Strives, who looked to be in a trance.~

Leaven: *Sighs and slumps to the floor, exhausted* Thank goodness you're safe, I thought for sure you'd be…

Adele: Leaven.

Leaven: What is it?

~Adele turns around with her bow drawn and an arrow ready.~

Adele: I should have known better than to trust you.

Leaven: Trust is a dangerous thing, but not as dangerous as those arrows. But honestly, what has come over you?

Adele: Leaven, my memory has finally returned to me, I remember everything, everything you and the boss have done to me and my father. How he was killed, how you attacked me...everything.

Leaven: But you don’t understand!

Adele: I understand completely now. I idolized you because of the memories I stole from you, all because of my power. It was in self defense, but I was lucky, and now I can finally carry out revenge on the two people who ruined my life.

Leaven: I cannot apologize enough for my actions in the past. However… the man you see slumped on the floor before you is a changed one. Before I fought for power, now I fight for my friends.

Adele: You always did have some corny lines, Leaven. Maybe you’re just too impressionable.

Leaven: Now look who’s lying.

Adele: Shut up, I’m going to avenge my father!

Leaven: You don’t even offer a last request? Selfish woman, I’ll bet you won’t even humor me with sex.

Adele: You did not just say that.

Leaven: I had to break the sexual tension somehow.

Adele: *Fires an arrow into Leaven’s shoulder*

Leaven: *Pulls out arrow and grabs wound* Damn, you’re quick to the trigger…urgh.

Adele: *Reloads* You’re pathetic lying there, wounded. I was actually hoping to fight you at your strongest.

Leaven: That’s a stupid resolve.

Adele: *Fires a second arrow, nailing Leaven in his ribs*

Leaven: *Slaps blood-stained hand to forehead* Hahaha! Wow, maybe you want that sex after all!

Adele: Grr…

Leaven: We both know you’re nothing short of a perfect marksman, and yet you’re taking shots no where near any vital areas. Do you want to kill me or not?

Adele: I’m trying to make you suffer as much as I have all this time!

Leaven: That’s touching, but as far as I’m concerned, you’ve only been suffering these past five minutes that you’ve had your original memory. You have no idea what real suffering is. Now tell me, what about your new life, your better one?

Adele: I have no other life besides the one I spent with my father.

Leaven: You seem to have forgotten many things despite having your “full” memory back, unless you’re not showing me all the doubt you no doubt have locked up away in that head of yours.

Adele: How can I doubt anything?

Leaven: I looked into your father’s secret research notes he hid in his quarters, around when I began mentoring you after the assault, and I wasn’t happy with what I saw. You were a sheltered baby, a research experiment, used by your father to mess with the minds of people. But unfortunately for him your mental powers never awakened until the mutiny, and he died just after seeing it.

Adele: You’re lying.

Leaven: You know I’m nothing short of disturbingly honest. Check his diary yourself; it was kept in the boss’ room. But…you already knew this, didn’t you?

Adele: Uh.

Leaven: Why do you want to kill a man who has done nothing to harm you? It was better when you weren’t brainwashed by a corruptible man of science. It’s ridiculous; in his diary he even mentioned plans of selling out his own organization to start some kind of a harvesting business. Harvesting what though, I am unsure. But regardless, there’s just so much to say about what we’ve gone through as a team…

~For the sake of sparing you from more dialogue, some time later a sort of emotional breakthrough was reached, and Adele and Leaven exit the room as new people, sharing one mind. The parts of Leaven’s being that were put into Adele many years ago return, along with new knowledge of her own power. This also means Leaven can finally manipulate the minds and wills of others again.

After these heartwarming events end, both of them are launched against the walls as the CIA vessel quickly halts over Partur.~

Fred: Call me Ishmael, it

GORE: Now preparing landing sequence(s).

Fred: turns me on okay lower the ladder we’re gonna drop down through the asteroids into the planet by climbing downwards

Rocky: What's this place again?

GORE: *Punches Rocky* That's not important. What is important is that we're here.

Rocky: But wha-*punched by GORE*

GORE: You go first.

~~~

Fontane: Orinfall, Llefirno, take Hatchet, Killface, and Barnaby with us, we don't have time to dilly dally with these raplipliones here, we got fish to fry.

Killface: I demand you let us go!

*One of the thug's cellphone rings*

Killface: I say, is that the theme from cat party?

Orinfall: No.

Killface: No, no no no it is! It is! Put it on my phone!

Orinfall: This seems vaguely familiar.

Killface: Be a pal.

Orinfall: Uhhh.

Fontane: Shut him up Orinfall, or I'm going to personally slap you around with my plus ten broadsword.

Orinfall: SIR YES SIR!

*Orinfall, Llefirno, Fontane, Killface, Barnaby, and Hatchet leave the building, and board a vehicle. It drives them to a nearby cliff, where Fontane gets out of the car, and pulls out a signaling device.*

Fontane: Time to test this gadget out...

*Fontane clicks a button on the device, causing a large red beam to rocket to the sky, a large tanker ship lands next to the cliff. A cold mist pours out of the doorway, and Admiral Frouzt steps out.*

Frouzt: Hello, Mr. Fontane, I have something you might want.

~~~

Meanwhile, in the car, Hatchet is coming to conciousness.

Hatchet: Where am I....

Killface: Ah Barnaby, Hatchet is coming to!

Barnaby: YOU DON'T HAVE TO SHOUT, I'M F*&KIN* TWO INCHES FROM YOUR FACE.

Killface: Excuse me, you silly beast.

Orinfall: Quiet back there, We're watching the godfather for tips!

~Front seat, on the television~

Oprah: Look under your chairs!

~The Audience looks under their chairs to find FLESH EATING ACID WORMSA AHHH~

Dr. Phil: See ever since i was burned in epic dino, I learned to burn others just the same.

Oprah: well said Dr. Phil.

Dr. Phil: Thank you Master.

~Front seat, passengers~

Orinfall: *scribbling on a notepad* Uh huh uh huh Flesh eating worms...

Llefirno: So beautiful.....

~Back seat~

Hatchet: Ok guys, I have a plan to escape.

Killface: WHAT WAS THAT, I'M WATCHING OPRAH!

Barnaby: Oprah lost weight.

Killface: Nonsense she's still a porker.

Orinfall: QUIET BACK THERE!

Doc: Oh right sorry, ok on the count of three we kick the door down, one.. two.... th-!

~wind blows the door open, the three passengers rocket out of the car, down a cliffside towards a lake below.~

Killface: I never got cat party...

Doc: That wasn't cat party..

Barnaby: I disagree, I think it was Cat party.

Killface: I agree with Barnaby that was totally cat party.

Doc: You two have no musical ear.

Killface: I'll show you musical e-

~The party hits the water, and one by one they crawl out onto the rocky shore.~

Killface: I wanted Cat party..